You're listening to the Transform your Life from the Inside Out podcast. This is going to be a compilation also of random thoughts I want to share. And I think I'm going to call these series because I'm going to do several of these, I think I'm going to call them pod side chats. So, in this episode, I want to share some random thoughts with you in this pod side chat that will help you Transform your Life. Keep listening.
Hi, I'm Jim Fortin, and you're about to start Transforming Your Life from the Inside Out with this podcast. I'm widely considered the leader in subconscious transformation. And I've coached super achievers all around the world for over 25 years. Here, you're going to find no rah rah motivation, and no hype. Because this podcast is a combination of Brain Science, Transformational Psychology, and Ancient Wisdom all rolled into one to take your life to levels, you've never thought possible. If you're wanting a lot more in life, to feel better, to heal, to have peace of mind, to feel powerful and alive, and to bring more abundance and prosperity into your life, then this podcast is for you. Because you're going to start learning how to master your mind and evolve your consciousness. And when you do that, anything you want, then becomes possible for you. I'm glad you're here.
Okay, so podside chat, I was thinking today about this episode. And for those of you that wrote in and let me know, your feedback from the last episode I did in this format, thank you very much. And this format, quite simply, is literally, I don't plan it out, I don't bullet anything out, I basically am just sharing with you. You know, thoughts from from notes that I've taken over many, many, many years, two and a half decades working with my brother in law. And I'm going to jump around a lot. That's what I do. Number one, but secondly, a lot of things pop into my mind. Somebody actually commented and said, I want Jim to talk about more spiritual things like he had mentioned in the past. What I want to point out, is that everything is spirit.
Everything is spiritual. I mean, you have spirituality and a tree, or a blade of grass, or a dog, or Mozart, everything is spiritual. It's just a matter of how we look at it. And the way that I look at it, because I'm a spiritual being. Anything in my external and my internal world, I can apply to myself spiritually. And I talk about money a lot in my episodes. And the reason why is money spiritual as well. I mean, there are many people that have written many books, you know, people like Wayne Dyer, and Marianne Williamson, and what's his name? Stuart Wilde. And people like this. I've written books about money and spirituality, because so many people are conditioned in the world to think negative things and bad things about money.
And as you probably heard me say before, is that money comes from the universe and what can be more spiritual, than that. I mean, we're all part of the cosmos. And you really can't help anyone. If you're poor. You can't even help yourself many times if you're poor. So money can be good when it's used as a tool, but it's not used to define you. And you don't make money. Your master, which I'm actually going to talk about, it's a bullet in this episode. Many people have been conditioned and they've learned to make money, their master, and I'll talk about that and a little bit.
Okay, so the first bullet, and I don't know how many I'm going to do here. I just, you know, grabbed my notes and went through notebooks and I literally have Jeez, five or six notebooks right in front of me if I have 25 years of notes and a lot of chicken scratch, that I'm having to go back and decipher. Let me let me pull some bullet points out for you. Okay, and let me share the so the first one we're going to look at is the only way to feel love is to love yourself first. Consider that. The only way to feel love is to love yourself first. So many people are wanting I don't I mean I don't know who doesn't want love right and doesn't want to be loved. But the mistake that a lot of people make is they go out in the world, wanting love and looking for love. Instead of being loveable. And that's a completely different ball of wax to be lovable.
Anyway, about myself many years ago, I think it was probably I'm Just thinking your 2001 I was traveling of Don Javier and my family was and we did some ceremonies, some spiritual ceremonies in Oracle, Arizona. And you probably heard me say before, if you've listened for any amount of time is, he doesn't teach me in the 3d. It'll even tell you. He's not a teacher, he just does what he does. And we absorb what we absorb those that are with us. And he talks a lot. Like, for example, he was here Saturday night, and he left at 6am. In the morning, he got here at eight, the night prior, you know, 8pm, on Saturday night, and they left at six in the morning. And he talked to me and those of us here all night long, about different things, and change, excuse me, changes on the planet, and all kinds of things, as is usual for all the conversations.
But I remember when we were in Oracle, Arizona, as I was saying, he teaches me in dream time, meaning a number one, no one can teach you anything you can only teach yourself. I'm going to come back to that story in just a minute. But I was talking to a Harvard professor who is an archaeologist, and archaeologists have studied shamanism for 70,000 years now, or many 1000s of years, not 70,000, but many 1000s of years. And this archaeologists said, so your brother in law teaches you lessons. And I said yes. And again, this was many years ago, and I recognized later, he doesn't teach me anything. He gives me the opportunity to learn. And the same thing about about this podcast, I can't teach you anything, I can simply present you with the opportunity to learn. And what you do with that opportunity is up to you.
As well,he reason I keep the podcast short and I started this kind of format for right now is people they want to we're in a world that's conditioned to consume content, content content, give me more give me more. Most people, it's it's research done. They don't even absorb 10% of what they're consuming. But yet they're wanting more. And I would rather you guys be like, if I get this correct. What was that all Bruce Lee quote is that I'd rather practice one kick 10,000 times instead of 10,000 kicks. And that's where this content becomes powerful is when you practice it, but you practice a fewer amount of principles until you master them. Okay, let's go back to Oracle, Arizona.
Dream time, which is where the lessons come anytime I need anything, I will text him and say hey, Don, can you and I use the words we use the word satellite? as a metaphor? Can you satellite me the answer and dream time or communicate with me in dream time and show me or give me guidance and dream time or whatever it is. And in dream time, I had this dream where he was in this dream and dreams are metaphors. And there are different kinds of dreams and different levels of dreams. There are dreams of power, which is what this was. And there are ordinary dreams. More on that later. Different topic, different subject later on. I want to keep my train of thought here.
Anyway. So in the dream, I was looking at a mirror. And I was I was looking in the mirror. And I was seeing him in the dream and the mirror while we wait, let me back up the whole story. I'm not even going to actually have anybody edit this. Let me just let me just actually start the story again. Because that's all coming back to me now as I think about this. Here. Let's go here. Sorry about that. In the dream. I was talking to him, and I was screaming at him. And by the way, I'm not a screamer. That's it's just no one that knows me can ever say they've ever seen me scream at anyone. And in the dream. I was screaming at him. And this is what I was screaming. I was screaming. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. Now mind you that's really for me that's a bit odd because I don't talk like that in my normal 3d consciousness. So anyway, and the dream. I'm screaming at him. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.
And if anybody remembers this, I'm sure a lot of you do the 1970s TV show I Dream of Jeannie where there was the bottle with the smoke and all of that. Well as I'm screaming at him. There's this bottle of or this something, whatever it was of smoke, and smoke just covers the room as I'm screaming at him. And it covers where I can't see him anymore. And then the smoke dissipates. And I'm looking in the mirror. While so metaphorically what I was doing is I was saying, I hate myself. And I didn't dismiss that. Because Ironically, the next night or so my sister said to me, she goes, and she came to my room and we're chatting, and she said something that was out of the ordinary for her. My family calls me, Jimmy. And she goes, do you love yourself? And of course, I gave the stock answer. Well, I think so. I mean, I guess I mean, what does that mean? But in that moment, in that dream, that was a lifetime pivotal lesson for me, is, I can think all day long that, you know, I like myself and all this kind of stuff, what I really have to look at, and I'm talking to all of you listening, what you really have to look at, is how you treat yourself. Because there's something that I'd mentioned before on another episode I had written on my Blackboard, and one of my offices for a decade, is how I create myself is how I perceive myself.
And I think back to college. And I remember taking an IQ test in college administered by the school psychologist, and I said, looking at your testing here, it looks like you have low self esteem. Now, I couldn't reconcile that. Because I had also said, I'm jumping here, because literally, self esteem is not the same thing as self worth and self love. I'll kind of put all this together. But I said, No, no, no, I just I, you know, I just want to be chilled out, I want to be humble, etc. I don't remember what I said. But something along those lines. And he goes, Well, you know what we might want to dig into your self esteem and look at that. And because there's always an achiever, and always everything that I did, I've done relatively well in my life. I thought I had high self esteem.
And one of my clients one time, she was one of the top 10, ranked in terms by her numbers, one of our her performance, one of the top 10 real estate agents in California. And I used to coach real estate agents. And I said, you know, what's going on here is that you have low self esteem. And she goes, No, I don't. She goes, how can I do what I do in life, I mean, you know, all this achievement and have low self esteem. And we work together a little longer. And she's like, Oh, my gosh, you're right, I never recognized that I do, I do have low self esteem. Now, let me segue there for a second is that self esteem is how you value what you think are your skills, things that you can do in the world, and your perceptions about your abilities in the world. And then your self worth, is what you think about yourself as a being. And I see many people that have combinations of low self esteem and low self worth. And as I'm sharing that with you, you know, I'm recapitulating all this that's why I'm kind of taking my time with what I'm saying is I had both, I do believe low self esteem and low self worth.
And until you love yourself, and learn to love yourself, then nothing's gonna change for you, for the most part. And that's a that's a nebulous one that's like, Well, how do I What does that mean? How do I love myself, and I recognized long ago, no matter who you are, no matter what your walk of life is, is the first thing that you can do before you can love yourself, is you have to accept yourself. You have to accept yourself. And in this world, that is so caught up on external things. People are taught all day long, you're not good enough. And I'm not pretty enough. And I'm not tall enough. And my skin's not young enough. And I'm overweight, and people are going to judge my car. People are going to judge this. And we live in this world where there's so many markers that people work by, and they learn to dislike themselves. And I remember just re experiencing somebody that unless you worked with my brother in law for this was 25 years ago, and she worked with him for two or three years.
And I saw her on Facebook seven or eight years ago. She's not worked with him in many years. And she's in her 70s and I don't think she's aged particularly well. But she radiates his vibrance about her. I mean she has this like this Pooler, this presence, and its vibrance and in that moment, it just dawned on me Wow. That's amazing. She really really really loves herself. So let me go back here is the only way to feel love is to love yourself first. Another part of that is so many because I just had somebody in one of my my coaching programs last Last week, say, I'm looking for love. And she's consumed by finding a partner, I want a partner, I want a partner, I want a partner. Many times people, when they find partners, they actually are more in love with the idea of finding the partner than they are actually having the partner. But what happens here also, and you know, you've seen this in your own life, maybe even in your own life.
Research has demonstrated that Cognitive Research at the University of Texas in the 70s, that we seek out people who confirm our own self identity. It's identity verification, is what it is subconscious identity verification. And basically, let me give you an example we've all seen, let's say that this woman is in a battered relationship, and she goes from battered relationship to battered relationship, or let's say abused. And then as I mentioned before, I know I know, I talked about this a little bit, she gets, but this applies to you. Also, every one of you listening this applies to you. It's not about the relationships, it's about the psychology here is. So what would happen is she would go from relationship to relationship, and people would think, Oh, my gosh, I'm so glad Susan got out of that toxic relationship. And then she starts healing. And then what does she do, she goes back into another abusive relationship. And the family's saying and pulling their hair out what's wrong with Susan, can she not see what she's doing? Well, what she's really doing is she's confirming her lack of self worth, by getting into a relationship, also with someone who will confirm her lack of self worth, which means she will seek someone out who will not value her and will abuse her.
Now, it stands to reason, but we generally generally don't think about this is people who have such low self worth low self value, they will seek out people that will confirm that low self worth net low self value, identity verification, the interesting thing is that the person that they seek out, is also a person who believes for example, you've heard many Yeah, well, I don't know. And on TV, and movies and all, you hear some guys say women, some women just need to be put in their place and slapped around or, you know, some nonsense like that. So let's say that you have a woman who is as really so low self worth and low self value. So then that's what she seeks out. And the partner she seeks out will believe also that women have low self worth, and our men and women have low value, therefore women need to be put in their place. So what happens is, she will attract a person that will confirm her identity, and he will attract a person that will confirm his identity, you have to be good with yourself first. I mean, you come into the world alone, you leave the world alone. And I see so many people that struggle with a lack of self worth, and a lack of self value.
They don't value who they are. And the reality and the unfortunate thing is is, is there's no barometer there's no kind of you can't get online and you can you can take all kinds of assessments and everything else. But how do you measure your self worth as a BEing a human BEing on this planet, there's no measurement, we don't have any measurement tape. And you will have to value yourself now. I mean, even the fact that you're on the planet, you're serving a purpose, you are valuable, and we're all valuable to different degrees. So what I want to share with you here the first point is the only way to feel love is to love yourself first. And then what I said is to love yourself first I have found in my own life, what what precedes that is self acceptance, and accept who ever or whatever you are, because if you can't accept who you are, and what you are, you know if you can't accept your body, or that's, you know, a great example A lot of people have you know, mid major body issues and they air quote, hate their bodies.
Well, look at that. I mean, how would you expect your body to respond to you when you hate your body? So something I heard my brother in law say to someone one time they hated their job. And this is not the same thing. But it's again, they hated their job. And all they were trying to do is run away from that job, they wanted something else. And he said something, it took a lot of years for me to say, you know, for it to soak in for me. But he said before you can find a fulfilling new job, you must value and love what you have. And I was talking to this kid today at Whole Foods, you know, supermarket, and he goes, I hate this job. It's a dead end job. But, you know, it pays my bills. And I was sharing with him that it's vital that you know what, appreciate this this job? Because if you didn't have it, where would you be I mean, you think you're down in life and your work, you've got a job, and you think you're down compared to your story about where you want to be and air quotes should be, you need to be thanking the manager who hired you, and the company who hired you.
Now, it just popping the mind. As I'm going. The reason I started talking to him today, and we had this conversation about eight, nine months ago, is he helped me have something in the store. And I actually went to the manager and told the manager what you know, an assistance, he was mean, he was very, very helpful to me. And I thought to myself, wow, he must love his job. And I recognized it's not that he loves his job. It's that he values in the way that he does his job. And he doesn't Well, okay, let's go back and finish up this point we'll move on, is the only way to feel love, is to love yourself first.
There's also a book that I recommend to everyone in my, I shouldn't actually get an affiliate link for this, but I'm just kidding him and I don't have one. But it's the book is called Love Yourself like your Life depends on It. And it's a very short book, I'm going to take you maybe I don't even know, like I read many years ago, like an hour to read. If even that, and it has literally daily just you're going to report it's going to, it's going to just tell you basically affirmations in front of the mirror. I love myself, I love myself, I love myself. What I've learned through my own life and observation is we don't destroy, what do we love? Consider that. So if you're overeating, or over drinking or over something that's destructive. Consider that we don't destroy what we love. Okay, so that's bullet, or point number one in this podcast, I want to keep the episodes at 30 minutes, 40 minutes, Max, why? Because attention spans and you know, people have busy lives. And I want to make it consumable. And I mean, chew on it. And so I'm only gonna have time for one more bullet point that didn't recognize it was going to go that long in the last one.
But another bullet point that I wrote, I did write down a couple of bullet points, but only from my notes. Because I've got notes, I got notes upon notes upon notes, and notebooks, and journals and everything. But one of the things that I pulled out is an episode number six is about this conquer the silence. Because now is the most important moment in your life. Because it's the only moment in your life. Ponder that now is the most important moment in your life. Because it's the only moment in your life. Now back to silence. I don't want to touch I don't really want to spend a lot of time on that. Go back and listen to episode number six. But basically, the reason I tied that in is you got to get quiet, you've got to get still, so many people are never quiet enough to live in a now, which is all there is the most important moment in your life. There is no future there is no past. That's even physics. Time is a construct of human beings. But we rush around. And I'm not tossing stones I've been there. We we rush around through life.
And because we rush around through life, I'm just popping in my mind that you had an episode on this recently when I mentioned the Beatles song. And John Lennon had said something like, life is something that happens to you while you're busy making other plans, guys, folks, people is that have you ever stopped to recognize that the majority of what you worry about is all related to something in the past. And more specifically, something in the future. Something that hasn't even happened yet. The future hadn't even happened and people worry about it. And you know, I'm actually downstairs in my office and one of my Dogs, he's 10. Now that dog just tied to me, you know, to help I got him as a puppy found him on Facebook. And actually, when I got him, I just saw him as a stray dog. So he came into somebody's yard and they said, Hey, you know, we call Animal Control five days in a row. And they never came and got him if you want the dog just come and get him. And he was a puppy, only three or four months old, and I brought him home. And he immediately just gel with my other four year or two year old lab.
But the thing about dogs is, you noticed dogs, they live in the now they're completely present. dogs aren't worried about what's going to happen tomorrow, they're definitely not worried about what happened yesterday, all they're focused on is what's going to happen or what's going on right now, in this moment. So let's all be like dogs. I mean, what's going on now, in this moment. Now, what I want to go with that for you. And all of you guys, is another point here that I that I pulled out on my notes earlier, is I wrote it down, here it is. All the things that hurt you and your past are not in your present. Consider that all the things that hurt you, in your past are not in your present.
And I was talking to someone today, I'm just being 100% laying it out honest with you guys and transparent. And I was I'm trying to think of my words here, I was a little resistant to the relationship today with this person. And after the after our conversation with this person. I walked away. And I said, you know, he's not like who we used to be. He really has changed. But I haven't noticed that as much because I was blinded. Because I was still living in my illusion, and my stories about who he was many years ago. Because he's changed. And that was evident to me, and not what he said, it was evident to me. And the way the conversation unfolded, because it unfolded in ways that he was demonstrating, not talking about, but demonstrating that he had changed. And in the past. The reason this is this bullet is all the things that hurt you in your past or not in your present is that it used to be a very hurtful person to me in the past. I'll leave it at that. And I don't get hurt by a lot of things. I mean, I'm not one of those people that gets into victim mentality, which I could do a whole episode on that and, you know, not having a lot of expectations of people. But I wish I could be more more specific, and I can't right now.
But I recognized he's changed. But you know what, I hadn't changed because I hadn't recognized that he had changed. So I was treating him as if he were the person who had not changed. And who was a hurtful person to me in the past, without recognizing that you know what, even that past doesn't exist now, because he's a different person. Now, I'm thinking here as I'm sharing this, and I know what a lot of you guys are thinking. You're thinking, Jim, how, how do I get in the present? How do I be in the present? We live in a world that has conditioned you. And I really want you to understand that as you've been conditioned to exactly who you are today. You've been conditioned as a baby. I mean, go back to the first couple of episodes I talked about this, or at least similar concepts is that you've learned to become who you are. And that you know, everything you are, you've learned to become. We've learned in this world, that you have to work to get ahead, which is nonsensical, hard work can pay off, but you must be the kind of person doing the hard work to get the results that you want.
And we literally live in a world it's all about human doing, instead of human being. Because people are judged on our world by and they're evaluated and you're successful by what you do, and the world or what you do not do and what we especially in the United States, what we don't know how to do as a culture, and it's globally as well. In first world countries. We don't know how to stop we don't know how to get quiet and here's something is just starting to emerge. It's been around for a lot of years and 1000's of years, and people have been talking about it the more than a lot more the last couple of years. But as mindfulness and being deliberate, and being mindful, are two things that automatically start balancing the body and start taking you in the peace and creating more peace is when you're living from mindfulness. And you're being very deliberate about things in your life. Flow random thoughts here is looking at myself over the years. Let's go back to dream time, again, is I remember in dream time, because I used to be an extremely impatient person. I mean, I was a DOer nice, productive, and I want things now. And in dream time, Don Xavier came to me. And he goes, you're gonna learn patience, one way or the other, is what he said to me in dream time.
And he took a box of long grain rice, you know, like Uncle Ben's long grain rice, we have that here in the States, it's just a brand, a consumer brand, is a big box of rice. And he took the rice and he dumped it upside down on the floor, there's rice everywhere. And he handed me a pair of tweezers, and he goes, don't come back to me until you've picked up every single grain and filled the box again. Now, of course, this was dream time and time is air, quote, time is different, in dream time. But remember, in dream time, this is 25 years ago, I had this dream. And remember that the bigger lesson was, is have patience. Because that's one of the things that keeps us from being mindful. And being in the moment, and being in the now, which is how I started this section is because I don't have any patience, I've got to get things done now. And everything has to be done now. Nothing has to be done. Now.
I remember one time, I was with a friend of mine in New York City, and she was very, very gifted, intuitive. And she could hear Actually, she she could hear when I said she could hear she could hear nonphysical beings. And one of the beings that's worked with me for a lot of years, his name is Don Juan, he was a shaman. sorcerer in Mexico, because I was so busy, I couldn't hear him. And he came to me one time through her. And I forgot what I'm trying to think here. But but the gist was, is that she's like, Oh, it's really important that you do this, like right now it's important than she used the word emergency for some reason. And then she goes, wait, I'm hearing him say, there are no emergencies in life. And now you might be thinking, Jim, what are you talking about? Of course, there's emergencies. I mean, people have to go to the hospital and everything else.
Well, when you look at life in the context of life, of course, there are emergencies. I mean, we were you know, we're having a baby, we want to go to the hospital, and this person had a heart attack, and they want to rush to the hospital. But in the grand scheme of your existence, there are no are borned emergencies at all. So what I would suggest you do this is your homework is, I don't have any one to recommend or anyone to refer. I do my own work. But get online and start researching some mindfulness training, and find something that I don't want to recommend anything. And the reason why is because different things work for different people. And if you saw something online, that might never resonate with me, you might never do it. I'm sorry, it resonated with me, it didn't resonate with you. And you wouldn't do it. If I said, Hell here's the training. But if you get online, or when you get online, and you find something and you're like, yeah, this looks really cool. I'm going to actually pay 20 bucks or 80, or whatever it is, I'm going to go through that mindfulness training that will help you you tremendously, not only in terms of slowing your mind and learning to be in the moment and to be at peace, but it will also help you in terms of your health.
Okay, so let's recapitulate here as I do on every episode is number one. And before I share this with you is take some time with this, chew it, digest it, taste it, and get introspective look at your own life. Because we love I mean, it's what the brain does. It filters out information very quickly. We love to filter things out. And I often find doing the coaching that I do. Many times people will say Well, that doesn't apply to me and Guess what many times it does apply to them, but they can't see it in themself. Like the story that I relayed to you earlier about the person who changed, but I didn't see it. And I was operating from my past interpretations about that person. Okay, so the major thoughts for today, this episode, is the only way to feel love, is to love yourself first. The second one is conquer the silence. Because now is the most important moment in your life. Because it's the only moment in your life. And then the next one, all the things that hurt you in your past are not in your present.
Okay, chew on that. And I said, When I started, I wanted to talk about money being your master. So what I'll do is I'll start the the next episode, with money being your master. And we live in a world. I see it every I mean, every day of people that air quote hate what they do for a living, they hate their lives, they hate the conditions, but they have become without even recognizing it. They have become a slave to money, and money is their master. And you can even asked them well Do you place a lot of value on money. And many times you're fooling themselves because they'll say no, I don't money's not that important. But they become a slave to money. Not even recognizing, I'm gonna give you a little tip here a little hint. If you're not doing what you absolutely love to do, in terms of income production, meaning for a living, if you're not doing that, because you're afraid to leave what you're doing, because of the security, air, quote, security of that position, and the income or the benefits or whatever, guess what, you have become a slave to money, and made money, your master.
We'll talk more about that next episode. And if you would, please, as I'm beginning is say on every episode, because I don't want this these episodes to feel like they're commercial. Please share the episodes, because if they helped you, they're going to help other people and friends and family. Okay, do what you can to make it a great day to day and I'll catch you on the next episode. Bye bye.
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