EPISODE 22: “Q & A – Would You Say It’s Best To Look At Things As They Are Or How You Want Them To Be?”
I answer this question in two parts because it can be answered two ways.
First, one of the biggest causes of unhappiness is that people refuse to accept life as it is at the moment. Most people are living in the past or the future and complaining about where they are not.
The “space” between where you are and your story about where you think you should be is what I call the “unhappiness gap for many people.
We have to accept “what is” so that we can change and transform what is.
Secondly, about seeing things as we want them to be.
Einstein said, “Your imagination is your preview of coming attractions” in your life.
Whatever you imagine, consistently, is what you program your unconscious mind with.
Research demonstrates that poor people imagine staying poor and rich people imagine and daydream staying rich, hence, programming that manifest as behavior.
To answer Steves question:
Accept life as it is in the moment and be grateful for all your blessings in life and next, focus on what you want, not on what you do not have.
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You’re listening to episode number 22 of the Transform Your Life from the Inside Out podcast. This episode is a Q&A episode, and in this episode I’m going to answer Steve’s question. Steve asked, “What would you say it’s best to look at? Things as they are, or things as you want them to be? Keep listening. Hi, I’m Jim Fortin, and you’re about to start transforming your life from the inside out. With this podcast, I’m widely considered the leader in subconscious transformation and I’ve coached super achievers all around the world for over 25 years. Here you’re going to find no rah-rah motivation and no hype, because this podcast is a combination of brain science, transformational psychology, and ancient wisdom all rolled into one to take your life to levels you have never thought possible. If you’re wanting a lot more in life to feel better, to heal, to have peace of mind, to feel powerful and alive and to bring more abundance and prosperity into your life, then this podcast is for you. Because you’re going to start learning how to master your mind and evolve your consciousness. And when you do that, anything you want then becomes possible for you. I’m glad you’re here.
Accept Life As It Is In The Moment
So Steve’s question, “what would you say it’s best look at? Things as they are, or how you want them to be?” I want to go a couple of different directions with this particular question because there are two things we can do this question. All right, so what we need to look at here is accepting what is, and that’s a challenge for a lot of people. And then secondly, which we’re obviously going to dig into here, and then secondly is when we see things as they are currently not. But we see things over and over in our mind, you know, as we want them to be. In that way when we do that, we are reprogramming the subconscious mind. So that’s the two aspects we’re going to look at in this episode is accepting things as they are, and then obviously we’re going to touch on a bit here of reprogramming your subconscious mind with seeing things in the way that you want them to be.
All right, the first part, accepting what is. If you look at your own life and you really, you know, you get honest with yourself, the biggest cause of unhappiness in your life is the space between where your life is and the story about where you think your life should be. That space in the middle there again between where your life is or what circumstances are and your story about what you think they should be, for most people, that is the space that I call UNHAPPINESS. Consider that for a moment. Pretty much all unhappiness in your life is because you don’t want to accept. You don’t want to accept what is, and you wish it was something different. And not only is this about circumstances. If you look at your own life, you know the classic one, we’ll take the mother in law. If the mother-in-law doesn’t work for you, then maybe pick someone else in your family. But have you noticed that when you think about a particular person, someone in your life, and you’re not happy with the relationship, you’re not happy with the relationship not because of who they are, but because of your story of who they are not. So the difference between who they are and your story of who they should be or who they are not, for most people is a source of unhappiness and frustration. So examine that in your own life, and when you really get honest with yourself and you look at what causes your unhappiness, it’s because life is not the “way that you want it to be.”
Also, you may notice here, you hear me, you know, and a lot of the episodes talking about living in the now and being present, many times many people are not happy because of something that happened in the past or they’re afraid or unhappy of something that they think might happen in the future. It’s very difficult to be actually unhappy about stuff. If you’re living right here in the now, and you’re accepting life for what it is right now, doesn’t mean you can’t change it. It just means that we have to accept what is, and then work from there. But yet most people never worked from there because they’re so busy being unhappy about the way that things are, that they just stay there. Not only that, you know, I’ve noticed over the years, and I don’t know if you’ve gotten your mind around this shit, but you’re the one, you are the one that creates your own life. I’m not responsible for your life, just like you’re not responsible for mine. And what I notice is that we all create our own lives through our choices, and you know, the decisions we make, ways that we’re being. We create our own lives. And then many people are not happy with the life they created, not even fully realizing that they are the one that created the life that they’re unhappy with. Just talking about past and future. So many people are upset about how things were in the past, how something was last week, last month, last year. And even longer than that. I remember a client I had one time and she told me, she goes, “I am mad at my husband.” And I said, “You know, what are you mad about?” And she goes, “Well, I’m mad about our divorce.” And I said, “Well, how long ago was your divorce?” And she said, “Oh, that was 10 years ago.” And I’m just sitting here thinking, wow, she’s wasted 10 years of her life being unhappy and not accepting things as they are for 10 years because of something that happened 10 years ago.
You know, I have a small confession to make here. When I do watch TV or movies, not always, but I do enjoy stupid movies. Um, I mean the confession is, I can actually veg out to Dumb and Dumber. And one of my favorite movies, don’t judge, is “Napoleon Dynamite.” If you haven’t seen the movie then this is probably going to get lost on you. But if you have, you know, Uncle Rico who was Napoleon’s uncle had always talked about how he could have been this great quarterback in high school. And then he said at one point in the movie, he said, “you know, if the coach would have put me in the fourth quarter, we would have been state champions.” I know it. But the whole point is, in the entire movie he talks about what a great football player he would have been way back. You know, way back when, many years ago. And the fact is, as he wasn’t accepting what is and what is that he sucked as a football player, because if he didn’t suck, the coach would have put him in the first quarter and not the fourth quarter. When it comes to accepting what is, you know, a simple example could be, and I know I think I’d mentioned this on another episode, that I bought a Porsche last November Porsche 718 Cayman S. And candidly, I really enjoy the car. It’s a lot of fun to drive. I mean, come on, it’s a Porsche. Anyway, I’ve only got like 3000 miles on it because I don’t drive a lot. And about a month ago. I’m sitting in a parking lot. I’m at a stop sign in the parking lot and boom, this guy backs on to me with a big SUV, and tears the heck out of the back of my car. I got out of the car and all that I said was, I looked at the guy and I’m like, “Dude, really?” I mean, that’s all that I said because, you know, I’ve been on this path long enough, and the evolution of self and growing myself and managing my emotions, what purpose would it serve to get angry in that moment? So what I did is I accepted what is and what is, that the guy backed into the back of my car.
And so, you know, I’m asking you to look at your own life. Whether it’s your car or relationships or whatever it is, do you accept it for what it is? Because you cannot start changing it until you accept it for what it is. And you know, even about my Porsche, it’s been in the garage. I mean it was, it was a big tender bender, I would say. He broke the spoiler, and hit the bumper pretty hard and tore into it. And the thing is this, my car there’s only 5,000 sold every year or bought every year in the US, and they had to obviously get the parts from Germany. So my car’s been in the shop now for three weeks and you know what? I really, really want my car back because I enjoy driving it. And I’ve got this rental car that’s like this huge rental car that I’m not enjoying. But the reality is, everything is what it is, so why not just appreciate it. You know, appreciate what it is in the moment and be okay with that. So I want to go back to being upset. How often have you been upset at someone, something, some situation, or your life because you don’t like the current situation or a scenario? In that moment you were not accepting life for what it is, you are actually upset at life because it doesn’t fit the story of what you think life should be. I see this all the time also, is that people are not happy with the circumstances of their life. And as I alluded to just a bit ago, is you’re the one who creates your life. And then many times people are unhappy with what they created.
Now you also, maybe you listened to the money episode a lot earlier, I don’t know if you did. If you didn’t, go back and listen to the money episode. Because it’s all about thought, it’s actually all about thought and feeling and vibration and frequency. So notice what happens. If you’re not happy with the circumstances of your life, you’re not happy with what is, which is what you created, then what are you thinking? What are you feeling? What are you vibrating? You know, what is your frequency? And then what are you pulling back to you? You’re pulling back to you energetically in physics. You’re pulling back to you more of what you don’t want. That’s why I have said, and if you haven’t listened to it, go over to JimFortin.com, my website, and download the master thought formula. And it’s a 90 minute training, I believe. Yeah, I think it’s about 90 minutes. And what I say in that training is be happy all the time. But again, a little redundant here. Most people are not happy because life isn’t what they want it to be when they’re the one who created it. And that’s why I said in the master thought formula is just be happy. And that in itself is a lifetime lesson for a lot of people because a lot of people actually live their life from the outside in. They let the external world actually determine their level of internal happiness. So for this part of the episode, what I want to share with you is your life’s going to get a whole lot easier when you accept life for what it is in the moment. Because once you accept it for what it is, and you’re okay with that, and I say a lot, it is what it is, once you’re okay with that, now you’ve got the freedom to start creating change in your life.
Okay, on the flip side. Now the question again was, would you say it’s best to look at things as they are or how you want them to be? So the flip side is seeing things as you want them to be. I’m going to reverse here and go a different direction, and hopefully this is not going to be confusing for people. But the reason that most, and I do mean most, the reason that most people, and you know what you’re probably like most people, and if you look at all the goals you’ve written down over the years and all, you know, all the things you wanted to create, I’ve done this for like, as I said, for a lot of years, and even looking at my own behavior in the past, you probably haven’t achieved, you know, a significant percentage of your goals. And I’m just being transparent with you. Before I started working from what I’m sharing with you in this podcast, which I’ve known for many years, but I found that old journals, I mean literally, I think it’s back from 1991. And I had this journal for a few years, and I remember looking at my goals in 1991. And two years later in the, in the journal, you know what, you’ve probably been here as well, I was still working on the same goals and hadn’t achieved them. Why? Because what I was doing is everyday I was seeing life from where I was, as opposed to where I wanted life to be. So what I was doing is living groundhog day, you know the same thing over and over and over. And the reason that most people never hit their goals is they see life as it is and instead of the way that they want to be it. Now, I did say earlier that we have to accept life the way that it is, but it doesn’t mean that we can’t change the way that you know life is. So what a lot of people do is let’s say money for example. They see their life, you know, they have no money and they just see that in their mind over and over and over, and that’s what they programmed themselves with subconsciously. And that’s what they perpetuate. So what you imagine, I’m going to slow down here, what you imagine over and over and over again reprograms your subconscious mind. George Bernard Shawl said, “Some people see things as they are and say, why? I see things as they are not and say, why not?
Albert Einstein said, and you might’ve heard this before, Einstein said, and this is powerful when you really understand how this plays out with the mind. Einstein said, “Your imagination is your preview of life’s coming attractions.” Why? Because your brain and research demonstrates this, your brain and your unconscious mind do not know the difference between real and imagined. And the more that you imagine something over and over and over again with feeling, the more that you imagine that over and over and over as if it’s actually real. And I even tell people to imagine things auditorily, visually, and kinesthetically, which means singing it in your mind, hearing it in your mind, and feeling it as if it were already true. When we do this, we are literally reprogramming the subconscious mind. And many, many years of research has demonstrated that wealthy people, they imagine, they daydream, they think about staying wealthy. And poor people, they imagine, they daydream, so to speak, and then I want to say daydream, I mean, they literally daydream about oh my gosh, I want to stay poor, but you know, daydreaming is a form of imagination. They imagine staying poor. And this is why in the United States we have fourth generations of families on public assistance. Why? Because they think that’s their condition because of their environment, because of their circumstances, and they simply think over and over and over again about being poor, and what they’re doing is they are programming their subconscious mind to stay poor.
If you haven’t listened to it, one of the episodes, please do, it’s the episode on reprogramming your subconscious mind. That to me in my interpretation is a very powerful episode because it’s the most powerful thing that I can teach you. It’s how we reprogram or get you started on, or get you to do your own research, on how we reprogram your subconscious mind. Because as you might know or not know, is that 95% of your entire behavior comes from your unconscious mind. So you’re creating all the things in your life that you don’t want based upon your subconscious programming. And I also use the word unconscious and subconscious interchangeably. Now when it comes to imagination, because this whole, you know, this whole question is about should we see things as they are? Basically, I think a better way to ask that question is should we accept things as they are? Yes, we should accept things as they are, and then actually move to create something different. But the second part of the question was about seeing things differently. And because imagination is a language of your unconscious mind, the more that you imagine something, the more of it you create. And if you want to take a step back here, and slow down, and you look at your own life, look at the condition of your body right now. Look at your bank account. And if you step back even a couple of days, you know, step back to yesterday, notice that what you have today is most likely a reflection of what you were thinking yesterday on autopilot. Look back a week from now, you know from thinking today about yesterday, look back, you know a week prior. Most likely 9.9999 times out of 10 is what you were thinking a week ago is showing up today, and then you just keep going backwards. And you’ll notice that what we do is every day we have the opportunity to create, because I tell people we’re born creators. I mean you can create any thing that you want, and that’s evidenced by looking at your life. You’re the one who created it. That’s evidenced by looking in the world
around you. I mean people look, anything that anyone else has created, you can create. But what most of us do is we create the same day over and over and over again by seeing things as they are, and not recognizing that when you see things as they are, again, it’s not the same as accepting earlier in this episode, but when you see things as they are and embrace them as they are, you just, you just keep repeating it. I want to share something else here, is that I know every one of you listening wherever you are right now at Point A, you want to go to point B. Here’s the problem, here’s why most people never get to point B, is see, point B is where people want to go. But people work from where they are, which is Point A to Point B, and they never get to Point B because you have to work psychologically from point B, which is seeing things as you want them to be. Hopefully that made sense to give you a medically documented, and I mean this has been documented so many times, stuff like this, it’s crazy, but the power of the imagination to create. So there was one study that I read that people were given a placebo effect. And placebo effect is nothing more than imagination. And you can heal yourself with imagination and a placebo effect. But in this one study, people were in pain and they were told they were going to be given morphine, yet they were given a placebo. And what they discovered in this research is that 74% of the time people got relief from the pain, yet it was a placebo. And you know what? The placebo is all imagination. So to Steve’s question, you know, we have to accept what is right now in this moment. But again, I’ve said three or four times we can change that. But when you change what you’re imagining, meaning, you change the outcome that you want to create and you start changing that, and you do it over and over, literally you’re reprogramming yourself at an unconscious level.
Okay, so let’s wrap this episode up, and you’re a transformational takeaway is pretty simple and very obvious. We must accept life as it is now, and then change it with where we hold our attention, which means we use our imagination to see things in the way that they are not currently. And we start programming ourselves for the, you know, the ideal weight, or the money, or the relationships, or whatever it might be. There is a phrase that I’ve had on my desk for many years. And I don’t have a lot of phrases. There’s not, I’m not like a motivational kind of guy that’s got stickies all over my office, and all that kind of good stuff. But there is a phrase that I just adore. This phrase, I love this phrase. And that phrase is this, “See things as you want them to be, not as they are.” See things as you want them to be, not as they are. And when you do that, you start actually reprogramming your subconscious mind. And do not be surprised if you start seeing these things show up in your life. Okay, so the next episode, the Wednesday episode is going to be a big one for a lot of you guys. How many of you have said before, “You know what, I need to get my lazy butt up off the couch. I need to exercise and want to lose weight. I want to be trim and fit, or I want to do something in my business.” Basically you might say there’s something that I want to do. Aaah, but I just don’t have the motivation to do it. And then what happens is because you don’t have the motivation to do it, because you’re looking for the motivation first, then what happens is you’d never, you’d never do it and you never have it. You never have it. So what I want you to get right now is that there is a way of being, a characteristic in a way of being that precedes motivation. And you’re going to learn what that is in the next episode. Thanks for listening.
Thank you for listening to this entire podcast. If you’re the kind of person who likes to help others, then share this with your friends and family. You know, if you found value, they will too. So please share via your social media channels. Also, if you have questions, I’m here to assist. You can email me questions to support@JimFortin.com, and I may even use your question for a future podcast episode. Also, if you want transformational content like this daily, connect with me on Instagram. My Instagram name is, @iamJimFortin. Finally, I do have a personal request. I believe that we’re all here to help others and to grow and evolve ourselves. Together, you and I, let’s help more people. If you would please, leave a review on iTunes and a good one, by the way. I’d be grateful. And through your assistance together, we can transform more lives. Thanks for listening.
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