EPISODE 231: “Why Aren’t You Getting The Change That You Want?”
If you’re like most people, you have asked yourself this very question. And, even if you have asked,why are you still not getting what you want in life?
Let me get to the point!
The only reason your life is not changing like you want is because you won’t change to become the kind of person to have that life.
The truth is that you can change. You change your mind many times everyday about many things. However, you’re not changing your mind in the most fundamental ways.
Also, if you’re like many people, you desire change, and because of this, you read books, watch videos and even listen to podcasts. You gather a lot of information from many sources, yet you probably experience little to marginal change in your life.
The fact is this: No matter how much information you consume, like podcasts or videos or whatever, two things generally keep you stuck – you refuse to change or you don’t know how to change and you stay the same.
This episode is more about the fact that you can change and you still don’t do it.
How come you can choose to change but you still don’t?
I talk about the exact reasons in this episode.
The only reason you don’t have what you want is because you won’t change. You’re making the choice through unconscious fears not to change. You must change enough to transcend your fears. Change is required.
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You're listening to the Transform your Life from the Inside Out Podcast. This episode is titled Why You Aren't Getting the Change That You Want. In this episode, I explain to you exactly why you're not getting what you want in life, whatever that might be. And many times, people give me pushback on this. But I know working with a Shaman for many years, many times the things that we need to hear and need to do, we don't want to hear and don't want to do. If you're wanting more in your life, then keep listening.
Hi, I'm Jim Fortin, and you're about to start Transforming Your Life from the Inside Out with this podcast, I'm widely considered the leader in subconscious transformation and I've coached super achievers all around the world for over 25 years here, you're going to find no rah motivation and no hype because this podcast is a combination of Brain Science, Transformational Psychology, and Ancient Wisdom all rolled into one to take your life to levels you have never thought possible. If you're wanting a lot more in life to feel better, to heal, to have peace of mind, to feel powerful and alive and to bring more abundance and prosperity into your life. Then this podcast is for you because you're going to start learning how to master your mind and evolve your consciousness. And when you do that, anything you want then becomes possible for you I'm glad you're here.
Okay. So why aren't you getting the change that you want? It's pretty simple. And I'm gonna cover it in this episode for you. If you've listened for any amount of time, you know that my brother-in-law is a Shaman and Shamans are Healers they're Seers. They help people grow. They help people heal and evolve spiritually. Now, oftentimes for us to grow that requires that we hear what we don't want to hear. And we execute on things that we don't want to execute on. So, the only reason your life is not changing like you want is because of one thing. Are you ready? Let me say that again. The only reason your life is not changing like you want is because you won't change. You won't become the kind of person to have the life that you want. Now I know that's pretty harsh and pretty brutal, but that's the truth. You won't change. And you're making that choice. The reality is you can change, you change your mind about many things every single day, but when it comes to getting what you want, you won't change and you won't change because here's another biggie is you refuse, you choose, you won't confront your fears.
Now for many years before I started working with my brother-in-law, which I believe I was 32, but even through college and everything, I was always reading and always learning and always looking for ways. And back then in the eighties, we didn't have YouTube and Podcasts and different places where we could gather, inform. So, I was always reading. And for me in particular, I was always reading about how to create money, but I was never doing it. I probably have read more money books than everybody listening to this podcast put together and we have an over, you know, we have we have 3 million downloads of the podcast. I mean, literally I've just read book after book, after book, after book, after book and analytically, I could probably be an expert on making money. But I still wasn't doing it. And the reason why is good intentions and good ideas and learning things that might get us a little bit, you know, further ahead in life, but it doesn't create the huge changes in transformation that we want.
And the reason we're not getting the huge changes in transformation that we want is because plan is simple. We're afraid to do what we've never done before. Because we won't do what we've never done before then we don't change. And if we don't change, then we cannot have what it is that we want in life, because we're not that kind of person, basically, we've not changed ourselves into the kind of person, the subconscious identity to have what we want in life. It's really as simple as. What we tend to do is we tend to ignore that and say, no, I don't want to hear that you're full of crap. Don't say that to me. Or the big one is, is we get arrogant about it is, well, I already know that. Well, if you already know it, then how come you don't have the things that you want in your health and your wealth and your relationships, because you might have heard it before. And I'm sure you have, I know like many people, this is probably not the only podcast that you listen to. And you've heard many things that I've said before from other people, but you're still making a choice because many people are choosing to be victim of circumstances.
And that means being victims of the economy or social circumstances or environment or their life programming or their family or whatever, and really what people are a victim to more than circumstances because we're not victims of circumstances. We're victims to our fears. And until we transcend those fears, we will always be a victim to those fears. You know, back to the comment I made a couple of minutes ago about listening and reading and all that kind of stuff, I wanna share with you, I don't know, it just, it doesn't matter how much information you consume, like podcast or videos or seminars or trainings or whatever. You know, two things happen. You like the content that’s why you listen to it, but you refuse to change. And because you refuse to change. The other thing that happens, which I just alluded to is that you don't get what you want, but mainly the two things that happen is you refuse to change because you refuse to leave your comfort zone. And because you refuse to leave your comfort zone. You don't change to be a person who leaves your comfort zone. Therefore, you always stay in your comfort zone. And I'm gonna just share this with you. This is the brutal part is if you don't get out of your comfort zone to change, because once you get out of it, you change differently than the person that was in it.
So, if you don't do. You're literally, and I'm gonna use this word you're doomed to live pretty much the rest of your life. Exactly where it is right now, you know, and the fact that you're listening to my podcast, which means that you do want more in life, but see listening is not enough. It's on executing, on what you hear and the courage to execute. There's no other way. Literally there's no other way, no matter what you think, no matter how much you wanna argue, no matter what you can say here, there's no other way to get what you want than to then not. Then, then to change who you are. That's the bottom line. So let me dig into that a little further. Let's go a couple of places here. So, I did say a few times, probably twice now is that you refuse to change. You might be thinking, Jim, that's a bunch of bullshit. Why do you think I'm listening? Why else would I be here? I want change. Do you really? Or do you want change in the way that you want it? And you will not actually transcend your comfort zone to create the change. And really that's about you are thinking about change, not you are executing on change, and you know, the reality is, is wanting change. and also knowing what to do. They're two very different things. So many times, we want the change, and we don't know what to do, or we do know what to do. For example, like reading a diet book.
So, you know, a person could say, I want change. I want to change my body. I want to go on a diet. I'm gonna read a diet book. If that worked then everyone who read a credible diet book, which there's probably about 27 billion of those on the market would get change. And then people will often say, well, I know what to do, but I'm not doing it. Why there's some fear preventing them from doing it. And mainly it's that they're going to lose something. They're going to lose their identity, meaning the easy casual life that they live. They're going to lose something which puts 'em in fear. Therefore, they don't transcend the fear to create the outcome that you know, that they want.
So right now, I think this is episode number 231, I believe, or something like that. And I could say, and I know a lot of people have, because they've told me, I could say, you know, I've given you 231 different ways to create more in your life, but the question is of that 231. How much have you executed on how much have you mastered? How much of it put you in fear and how much of that when you got into fear that shut you down right then and there, and then you wonder why you didn't get through the fear, you know, so I've already shared it here, but the number one thing that stops you from having what you want in life is the fear. And I probably have a dozen episodes titled. That is afraid somewhere in the title, because I address the topic. And even if you're an avid listener and by the way, I do appreciate it seriously. I do appreciate it. I love what I do. And more than anything, it's not about me loving what I do my wish. My great desire is that it makes a difference in your life. Not a little difference, but a big difference. And in particular, when you execute on it. But the question is, you know, the question that I have for. Probably if you're like most people who listen, you've listened to a lot of episodes more than once, but the question is this, how come you're still not creating a much, much, much better life for yourself?
Something that you perhaps couldn't even imagine in the current moment. And you might, you know, it got a little bit of change each and every year, but you're not getting Transformational change for the reasons that I've already talked about. I wanna go back to this statement when I said refuse to change, you know, I know, I know that some people don't like it. When I say it, I know that I can rub people the wrong way. I know that I can piss people off. And you know what? I was talking to one of my coaches one time and she is a licensed, licensed family therapist. And she said, you know, Jim, I don't think that it's, that people dislike you. I think that you tell them things they don't want to hear. And that makes 'em angry. Then they actually projected on you. And the reality is it's not my job to be liked. Literally. It's not my job to be a person's best friend. It's my job to help people make transformational shifts in their life. I remember one of my other coaches also, and she was talking to the Transformational Coaching Program group, and she was coaching in the group that day. And she said in the group, she goes when Jim was coaching me when I was in this program, I wanted to punch him in the face. Those are her exact words. And she said I was pissed at him. And then she said later, I thought about what he told me, and I didn't want to hear it. And that's why I was so pissed off at him. And I didn't want to hear it in the way that he said it to me. But as I thought about it, he was right. And that's made a huge difference in my life.
So, I know that in these episodes I can come in a certain way, but I do it for a particular reason because many times I wanna grab people by the shirt collar and say, wake up, or, you know, wake up already. You deserve a better life. You can create a better life, but as long as you stay in your shit, which is your fear, you ain't gonna have it. And many times, I'll ask people, I'll say you know. What do you think the number one thing is that stands in your way between you and what you want? And an overwhelming answer that I get is, oh me, I'm my own worst enemy.
And then people stop there, but it's not just you as a being it's you, the person processing the fear because we never really think about that. So, it's the fear that stands between you. And I also wanna point out in fairness to you is that fear is hardwired in the brain. And there's a difference between fear and danger, which I've said before, probably a dozen times in different episodes. And many times, we're getting into fear, but we're not in danger, but we think it's danger because we think people are going to judge us socially or specifically. Oh my gosh. If I do something new, I do something different. I invest some money. Oh my gosh. I'm not going to have what I have now. And I can lose that. And I wanna share with you that. That is a broken strategy. I'm just being candid. I have invested in a lot of people and consultants and, people that create Facebook ads and many, many things in my world of online market. Just being transparent. There was a guy last year I committed $268,000 to month number four, they were only at 40% of their goal. I fired him, but I lost over a hundred thousand dollars in productivity and cold, hard cash because they didn't deliver. And then they finally couldn't come up with a plan and that's when I fired him. And what I'm sharing with you here is that there are no guarantees in life.
So, I know that if I get into fear that I can't grow, I can't grow personally. I can't grow the podcast. I can't grow my social media following if I stay in my fear and don't step out there. So, for now, well now for me, it's second nature to say, you know what? Yeah. You know, I'm not really thrilled about this investment or I'm not sure about it, but when I've gathered enough information to make a good decision about someone. The reason I, you know, did the, did the $268,000 with that guy? He's got a nice size little company, but I coached him 10 years ago. And he is a very decent, very honest person, but the reality was he couldn't help me with what I needed. So, I chalk it up. Okay. Cost of doing business. It's a loss. And in your own life, you're gonna have, let's use the word wins. You're gonna have losses. The reality is if you're afraid to either lose money to any point, there's no way you're gonna win. It's just not gonna happen. Because again, you're not putting the money out there. You're not putting yourself out there. You're not transcending the fears to become the kind of person that you want to become two things to have the things that you want to have in life. Hopefully that makes sense. And the reality is this. There's no other way. There's no other way to get what you want other than becoming the kind of person who would have those things and the way to become the kind the person is to change, and change requires courage.
If you don't do that and embrace that again, the phrase no other way, it's not gonna happen. You know, many people say, if nothing changes, well, then nothing changes and that's not entirely true because the reality is nothing changes, which are things outside of you, nothing changes. If you do not change things, don't change people change. And when people change. Things change as a result of the people changing. But what many of you are wanting is you're wanting things to change in your life, but like a kid sitting here with your arms, you know, crossed, and you're holding your breath, like a kid throwing a fit, and I'm not calling you a kid. This is just an example. You're wanting to change, but you won't change. And that, that is a choice. And you know, when I look at those things don't change. We still have 24 hours in a day. 24 hours is still 24 hours. Money is still money. Health is still health. Love is still love. France is still France. Australia is still Australia. The United States is still the United States. The planet still rotates on its axis. These things are what they are, but we're wanting change in the external world. Again, like that metaphor I gave you with the kid. We won't change. Why? Because of fear. Now question for you. When you hear me say that and you think about it and you process it, how do you feel about that?
What kind of feeling does it create in you? When you think about having to change things you don't want to change? Or doing things you haven't done to create what you want. I guess the main question I want to ask you is what kind of fear does that bring up in you? And it's important that we identify that fear or at least what it feels like, because now we know what it looks like. And I do wanna point out also I'd mentioned fear and danger and part of danger is brain based. The older part of the brains, the brain that's responsible for our survival, because there are many things like identity confirmation and disintegration anxiety and stuff like that, things that are going on in the brain to keep us safe, which is a survival mechanism. But many of those things don't exist in the world that we live in anymore. So, I could sit here on this podcast episode. And I literally seriously, literally I could talk to you for six weeks and make it a marathon six-week, 24 hour a day episode. And I could bore everyone here to hell and bore 'em to death. And I'm bored as well.
The reality is this. You can rationalize, you can analyze, you can evaluate, you can second guess, but the only solution to having more in life is being more in life. And the only way to be more, you're not doing it because you won't go through your fears, which must, which means you must be the kind of person to go through your fears so that you can have what's on the other side of your fears, you know? And, and you can sit here, I get it. And you can argue with me, or you can toss rocks at me or whatever, and tell me how wrong that I am, but you know what Don't listen to me, look at your past because your past will tell you everything about how you have shown up in your life. And if you look at your past, ask yourself how many things did I not do?
How many opportunities did I pass up on? Because I was too afraid to do something different because if I did something, I was afraid that I would lose something. Therefore, I did nothing. Therefore, I didn't create any change. That's something really big to ponder. The second aspect is that we might want change, but we don't know how to change. Many years ago, I remember when I start, I first started hiring consultants for internet marketing. And this is how I can relate to you guys because I'm you, but at a different place. So, I'm thinking back, and I'm remembering that I wanted to go to a training, which I believe was about $5,000. And I was wanting to hire a consultant, which was about $3,000 per month. I remember sitting down in a living room and I was going through this internal battle in my mind, invest the money. Don't invest the money, invest the money. Don't invest the money. Invest the money don't invest the money. And I was going through all this analysis and these checklists and all this kind of stuff.
And what dawned on me is what I'm sharing with you right now. And the reality was, I said, you know, what is, I want to change? I want to grow my business. But the reality is when it comes to online business. I don't know how I know marketing, but I don't know the intricacies of internet marketing. And if I want change, which I'm sitting here babbling about to myself back then, if I want change, my only option is to bite the bullet and pay someone that can actually show me how to get the change that I want and to lead me through it. And I'm telling you right now, I mean this humbly, but I own, I run, I manage a yearly a multiple seven figure business. I would never be here today. If I did not influence the exact strategy that I'm sharing with you in this very same episode. That's how I know that it works. And I've coached many thousands of people, all different levels all around the world. And I get them to do the same. This is what works, what doesn't work is sitting on the sideline, always being in that fear and that fear and that fear. And what if, what if, what if I do wanna point out that I'm not responsible for your finances? So, what I wanna share with you is make wise choices about who you trust.
Earlier I had mentioned the $268,000. I trusted that person. I've known him for a lot of years and they're very capable internet marketing. They just could not pull it off nor could his team pull it off in my particular industry. So it wasn't that I made a bad decision. I made an, an accurate decision. So, what did I do? I fired reevaluated, hired someone else that helped me actually reorganize my entire business in a way so that I could get the outcomes that I want. This one person I'm thinking about after this last person that I fired, I paid him 15,000 bucks for eight hours, $15,000 for eight hours of his time. Somebody I've known for a lot of years, which is an extremely well-known internet marketing expert, 15,000 bucks for his time to completely reorganize my business, which has been done. And I'm starting to show benefit of that. Now a few months later, let me personalize this a bit. I think many times in life, it's very easy to be judgmental and critical of people, especially if we haven't been in their shoes, but I've been in your shoes. I've been there before, and I know it doesn't work. And I know that my business, this podcast alone is in the top one, half of 1% of downloaded podcasts in the world in just under three years. There's a reason for that. And I'm obviously the voice of the podcast and I create every single episode myself, but I mean a technology and everything else and how to do all this.
I have a team and I do know that if I didn't step out and start living what I'm sharing with you in this episode, there's no way you would even be listening to this episode. Right now. You know, something that I have talking about the judgmental aspect or whatever, I'm not judgmental about this, but it's for perplexing for me. So, my passion is helping people transform their life. I don't mean a little more, little better, a little different, I mean, making a huge shift in their life. And I've seen this for many years now and it's still perplexing, but I understand it is when I look at my Transformational Coaching Program. Is 95% of people, if not more than that will tell you that, that the Transformational Coaching Program makes a massive or huge difference in their life. And when I offered the people twice a year, I even offer it with a full refund because I know the quality of what I do. And in five years of doing that program, we've had less than 15 requests for refund. 15 people in five years out of thousands of people. So, I know that it works. So, I sit here often scratching my head saying, okay, these people, I bend over backwards. I can do, I can change their life. Meaning I can help them. I can lead them. I can guide them. I can show them how to transform their life, but they sit on the sideline, which is what I'm talking about in this episode. It just doesn't work. I live that broken strategy because I know that listening even to the podcast, like I said, we've we're right at 3 million downloads.
There are thousands of people that want change, but here's the reality. They won't change to get the change. Does that apply to you? You want change? But you won't change to get changed because you won't change the fact that you won't go through your comfort zone to get what you want. Let that soak in and ponder that because I'm telling you, you know, kind of, ah, sigh a brutal truth. And when I started about my brother-in-law, the Shaman, I I'm telling you, there are many times I did not want to hear things. I don't want to hear things. I don't wanna fricking hear that. Don't say. The reality was when I look back years ago, decades ago, working with him, many of the simplicities that he shared with me, I share it with you in these episodes, but when they confront our model of reality or our personal reality, many times, we don't want to do anything differently about it, because again, that creates fear.
So, I think you're getting the point here is that no matter how much you want change in your life, no matter how badly you want it, no matter how badly you desire it, it's not gonna happen for you. And I'm trust me when I tell you, I want the best for you. It's just a reality that it's not gonna happen for you because you won't create the change in the context of your self-image, meaning you won't do what you have to do, because that requires you to change. Whether you hire someone, you hire a coach, whatever you won't change your self-image, which is what you need to change to create the change that you want to create the wealth and abundance and the health and all the things that you do want in your life. I'm gonna say for the third time, in this episode, no other way. That's the only way that it happens.
I think what I'm alluding to also, and I've already mentioned it is that if you want change, you've gotta change and you've gotta change with someone who can show you and lead you and guide you to the change that you want. So, speaking of change, you might have already heard in this episode that my BE DO HAVE series is coming up. Now, if you're listening to this later, you might not hear it in the middle of the episode because my team put it in here as an ad, and they'll pull it out after this series is done. I do this series three times a year, and you know what? It's no charge. It's no charge for the series. And how many of you have heard about it before, but you still don't make time and you still don't do this, and you still don't do that. Or you don't show up for the calls or the training or do the work that's you not changing. So, I'm telling you right now, just keep an eye out. If you're opted into any of my list, the BE DOHAVE series is coming up. It is a three-part series. It's live. I'm leading it. There's no charge for it, but the whole thing, you know, behind me telling you this, I'm sorry to say it this way you gotta change.
So, your transformational takeaway is this the only reason that you don't have, what you want is because you won't change. You're making the choice through unconscious fears, not the change. So, you have to accept, let's just be brutal about it. You have to accept that your life is never going to change much differently than what it is right now, unless you change. And the only way to do that is to go through your fears. And by the way, the BE DO HAVE series. The only fear you could possibly have there because I charge nothing for it is that you might give up a few hours of your time and if it's not worth it for a few hours, then don't listen once you're there, but you're not gonna know until you show up. So, your takeaway is if you don't change, nothing's going to change in your life. All right. Thanks for listening. And I'll catch you over on another episode. Bye.
Hey there. I wanna segue really quickly if you're in any sort of fear around the current economic client that we're experiencing right now, I'm doing some live coaching over on Instagram and I'm calling it. Don't Just Survive, Thrive in These Uncertain Times. And I'm gonna guide you on how to navigate these unknown, uncertain times that are scaring. A lot of people simply head over to @iamjimfortin. Over on Instagram and start following me there so you can get notifications. When I go live, I'll be going live on August the 17th, the 24th and the 31st at 1:00 PM, P D T, which is basically mountain time. Right after that, I'll be doing my live BE DO HAVE series, and I'll be starting that on September the 6th. And you'll definitely wanna attend this free series. Literally over a hundred thousand people have been through this program in the last couple of years and it's free. And many people have said that I should charge at least a thousand dollars for that program. So, if you're looking to make the next year, your best year ever, despite what's happening in the economy, whatever you do, plan to attend that series, starting on September the 6th.