You're listening to episode number 50 of The Transform your Life from the inside out podcast. This is a Transformational Story Episode. And in this episode I visit with Lisa, and you're going to hear Lisa say that she was a air quote, "hot mess". When we started working together, she'll tell you that she was an enabler, she was in a less than positive relationship, and she was upside down in many areas of her life. So I'm sure that many of you will be able to relate to her story. So keep listening.
Hi, I'm Jim Fortin. And you're about to start Transforming Your Life from the inside out with this podcast. I'm widely considered the leader in Subconscious Transformation. And I've coached super achievers all around the world for over 25 years. Here, you're going to find no rah rah motivation, and no hype. Because this podcast is a combination of Brain Science, tTransformational Psychology, and Ancient Wisdom all rolled into one, take your life to levels, you've never thought possible. If you're wanting a lot more in life, to feel better, to heal, to have peace of mind, to feel powerful and alive, and to bring more abundance and prosperity into your life, then this podcast is for you. Because you're going to start learning how to master your mind and evolve your consciousness. And when you do that, anything you want then becomes possible for you. I'm glad you're here.
Okay, so today, all the way from Australia, and it's early in the morning over there right now. So we're visiting with Lisa, she's been she's a Transformational Coach. She's been in my programs now for almost a year and a half. And we're going to talk about Lisa's story. Yeah, it's been a long time she's nodding her head, we're going to talk about Lisa's story, which I'm sure a lot of you can relate to. And I want Actually, let's just dig in Lisa, the short version, tell them where you were when we met emotionally and your life and where you are now.
I remember, I remember exactly where I was, when I was on the webinar, that I jumped into TCP on the back of I was in Laguna Beach, I was there for James Wedmore's mastermind event in Laguna Beach. And so obviously, being from Australia, that's a big deal. I was away from my family, I used to have a lot of I have three and children, they're eight, seven, and five. And I used to have a lot of guilt, like leaving the kids and, and leaving my partner who has significant mental health issues is a big deal for me to get on that plane and come to the other side of the world. But I knew that I needed that kind of high vibe. And I needed mentorship and you know, James, obviously, but I remember sitting there on the bed listening to this webinar thinking, I know, I am the reason why certain things are happening in my life. And it's funny, because now 18 months later, I can reflect back and go, I didn't know shit. Like I didn't know. I thought I knew what that meant. I thought I knew what it meant to be the block in my life. But I didn't really have any sense of how to move through it. And because we're,
Let's give them a little more background, if you would, and you can be as personal or not as personal as you want. It's up to you. But I think you've opened up to your audience a lot in the last year. Where was your life? I mean, the quality of your life at that time, because I want them to see where you were and then take them through your journey to where you are today.
Okay. It's hard to talk about and you know, that like,I was all the emotion
Breath, she was a hot when I met her she was a hot, emotional mess. The hot mess we call it in United States?
But hang before you keep going here because we're going into you're moving here, let's go back, just breathe. Just breathe were going back to
Definitely.Yeah, we call it a hot mistake. It's a universal language of being completely at the I was at the mercy of my emotions, I didn't think I had any choice in my life. So we had, so we had lived into state away from family and friends for 10 years, I'd had my three children on my own left. So with no no family support, it was just my husband and I and, and he had you know, I can see now that the mental health stuff was going on for very long time. And I was very much in the fixing mode, I was very much in the doing everything for everybody else. I didn't even know how to prioritize myself. But I had created this little I had created a whole foods blog. Back when my I think when I just had the two kids and I got so much enjoyment from sharing recipes and showing up on on social media, I have a background in Journalism and TV production and that sort of stuff. And I found social media just like Ellen use a platform I'm just gonna play, I would be you know, walking around my house with a sweat mustache because we lived in Queensland. And I felt people connecting to me in a very real level. So as I was following these in, and I launched an online program, and it went bananas my first launch I hadn't released, I'm
I felt that there so much I need to say,
I know No. And then just we'll get there. I know that you've talked a lot about to your audience about your personal life and your husband. So whatever degree you're comfortable talking, when you say mental illness that leaves with people don't know what that means. So it can be anything. And so I'm wanting people to be able to connect with your story. So they can be like, Okay, so what does that mean? And if you want to share it, if you don't, that's fine, too. What does it mean, when you say mental illness?
Well, I don't, I mean, I haven't shared really publicly ever, what his particular struggles are, because it's really personal for for him. But I think for a long time, there was I mean, anxiety and depression, and all of those sorts of things, but a lot of deep, deep trauma that he experienced in childhood that he was kind of self medicating himself through until that stuff didn't work anymore. And in 2017, so that's where I was sort of going to become a self sufficient, I can do everything, I'm starting a business, I'm doing all this stuff. And then he had a he had a breakdown in 2017. And that led that has that led to this sort of road of recovery for him, that, I just had to take on all of the well, suddenly my business was out in a family's income. He wasn't a particularly present person in our lives, even though he was here. He was dealing with stuff. And, I was very much in that kind of codependent relationship, where I felt like I had full responsibility for his happiness, his welfare. For him, I felt like it was all on me, I felt like there was things that I was doing or wasn't doing that actually impacted him, and made him feel a certain way. So I was, and in the meantime, I wasn't taking care of myself, you know, we ended up moving back to our hometown, and I got
shingles. And I was really, really sick. And I had my big wake up call. When James actually said to me, Lisa, you're not you're not being responsible for yourself. And I was like, what you don't understand, like, in my mind, I'm like you didn't understand responsibility. You didn't understand three and children, you didn't understand an animal husband, you understand that I like I'm responsible for income now. Like, you don't know anything about responsibility. But I get what he was saying at that time. And it actually led to a really big breakthrough for me, which was Lisa no one else is going to do this for you. No one else can make it better for you. No one else can take care of you, you know, and all that sort of stuff, which led me to you. And that led me to going, you know what, like, if I'm creating everything in my life, because I like it's all coming from within me, I'm allowing certain things and making certain things that Okay. Then I want to look at myself. And I was deeply, deeply, deeply uncomfortable doing that, because I was in that mindset of it's if only my husband was well, yeah, if only we weren't having to deal with is it only all the kids were in school, I could focus on my business. I mean, just all the stories, stories, stories, stories, that were actually stopping me from putting the mirror back
on myself and going Hang on, what role Are you playing in this, Lisa? And, you know, since then, this year, I've actually separated from my husband. And it's been an extraordinary process of waking up.
Hang on right here, right there. I don't know. I don't want to rub because people like let her keep going, let her keep going. But I want to go back here. So where you were. And that whole ok. Notice everyone listening that she did say stories and stories and stories, which you've heard Jason talk about, you've heard Katie talk about. And Niduk talk about which we do a TCP is we don't recognize the amount of stories that we get into. Now, what I heard you say is basically you were playing victim, and not responsible to everything in the world. Not only were you trying to keep your world together, then you were looking out for the kids. And you're like, Okay, now my husband's not working. And I'm the money earner, and we have kids, and we live here. Now, not only that, let me be responsible for him, too. And then whatever I do, if he gets angry, or he gets this, or he gets that, then it's my fault. So what you were doing is, you were trying to manage every single person and every single thing in your life. You are exhausted you were a hot mess. And I remember when I first met you, I pull you out of your story you used to love like a rubber band to snap back and go right back into your story again. Right?
It was, it was like a habit, it was a brain hack
exactly was a habit where you'd go right back. And by the way, you're you're you've taken what you've done and you become, which will keep on going here. And you've taken a lot of what you've learned, and we'll talk about and become a coach, a Transformational Coach. Now, for a lot of people in Australia, through having your experience, you now know how to help people through those kinds of experiences. And it doesn't have to be the mental health or self medicating or any of that. But you've learned tools over the last 18 months, that no longer you smile now. And when I saw you 18 months ago, you were crying all the time.
Crying all the time. That was a story. I'm just an emotional person, you know, that even that? Even that is, is a story that I allowed myself to be led by my emotions. And, and and I didn't realize the patterns I was in. I didn't I didn't realize it. And that's why I hope that's why you know, you know, I know, I created the ready for Change program, because I actually think stories like if you actually really understand how you're telling yourself, so many lies, you made up your entire life. And you built these like glass books for yourself to live in. And when you can actually see that for what it is. It's extraordinarily freeing. And you get to start living a life like you that you create, intentionally instead of just by default.
Yeah, and look at you now. I mean, I don't know where the team is going to use this particular interview, whether we're going to just do audio, or video, some probably video also on YouTube. So you do have makeup on this morning. Normally, she's actually shooting video on bed. And she's pretty anyway, so it doesn't matter. She's got three small kids, but but notice 18 months ago, how you were constantly crying. And then part of the story was, well, I'm just an emotional person. Now, every time I've seen you, and especially when I saw you, because you're in my mastermind. And when we were talking about the money you were making, either this year or next year, you're like, you know what, no, it's a million dollars a year, when you were in the front of the room, remember? And 18 months ago, you were like flipped upside down? Where are you today? And then we're going to bridge that for listeners.
Okay, I mean, I can give an example. That's happening right now. So even although I am not living with my husband anymore, and we are making it a separation, he's still very much struggling with himself. And in his life. He has lived in a kind of a care husbandfor six months. And he recently got out of that and has spiraled out of control. And I'm in launch program. Right?
She means internet marketing launch, launching a program, okay,
Launching my program, which means I need to be visible, which there's a lot of exciting energy around a program launch. And I'm so excited to welcome new people in. And yet there's this and it's been this dance for me the whole time. Because anytime I would do I would disappear off and have my focus somewhere else that really affected him.
In the past for me now you're not with me, but in the past. Yeah. So he would call you right back down again.
Yeah, I mean, you saw me have to fly home from Laguna Beach one time earlier. You know, it was it was real. I
Before you keep on stop right there, you said you saw me have to fly home. You and I had a conversation. Rather, do you want to change the phrasing on that?
I chose to go home,
That was a particularly interesting situation.
But generally, you were just in your emotions. At that
I was I was I was still very, very hot. And I still was in it. Like I was really in it and I was working my way through all this stuff. But I wasn't at a place the place that I am at now. And I think that's a really important thing for people to know. It's why people do TCP so many times, because we just we want to stay in the content, because it's like layers of an onion. And you can sense things can be different, or you get the sense that you're growing. But as it becomes like the domino effect, you know, like if you pile dominoes up in a row, and one falls and you like, all these dominos, because my life just keeps getting better and better and better. But
I want to take apart for them. Hey, notice, do you remember Okay, so she flew to Laguna Beach, I was there. She got there, like one afternoon and next morning, she's ready to go back to Australia. Again, this massive flight, I mean, the flights longer than the time she was there. And she was a hot mess, I'm like, come here, and we sat down and talk and you were crying when we started and everything else. 45 minutes later, you were laughing. And I said, if you notice, you're not crying anymore, you know where I'm going right? And I said, What happened? And I said, you have moved your attention, which people hear me talk about a lot. When you moved your attention, your entire emotional state changed. Now where you are in your life now, your husband hasn't probably changed. And there's nothing It is what it is. But the external things in the world have not changed that much, most likely in a year. But it's where your attention is and how much you've changed in a year than if they could see you on video. You're smiling when you talk about your future. It's because that's where your attention was. But for the most part things and people in life are the same things and people they were 18 months ago, but you're not the same and your attention is not the same.
Right? Right. Its head? What 100% So now, I know I have a choice about it. How because this is the thing I like I was massively triggered by you just saying you just because it didn't change what had actually happened at home. And the fact that I really felt I needed to be back. Yeah,
But what I've realized Ever since then, is the amount of choice that I have around my attention and that things can still happen, that are uncomfortable or sad or even traumatic. But it's it's, it's my choice, the energy that I give that and the attention that I give that and my life isn't necessarily better, the more attention I give it, whereas they used to sneak to think like, what do I need to do? And you know, just be really in it and really messy. And because that was my pattern. Yeah. Whereas now right now, I'm like, Lisa, the only thing that you can manage right now is where you place your attention and your energy and energy. And so I kind of unlike even although all this stuff is happening, and that's what really started to change for me, you know, we talked about it's a slow, it's a process that you go through. But last year, I really started to experiment through, you know, TCP and working with you was was was my energy and understanding literally like, I get to choose how I show up to the day no matter what's happening around me because I get to dial that in, like which frequency do I want to operate? Like, where do I want to position? And so the I know, I say to a lot of people, you can choose to be happy. Like I have literally chosen the story of my
separation. I haven't chosen for that not to be a failed marriage. Yeah, I marriage. Like we had a great marriage, we we loved each other in a way that we understood to be love at that time. But now it's just like the evolution of that relationship. It's just in a different spot right now. It doesn't have to mean tragedy. My children, it doesn't have to mean, I am an overwhelmed hot mess again, because I'm solo parenting. It doesn't have to mean anything like that. I got to
accept me. Yeah, except the meaning that you give it
you give up. It's my choice. And so you know, that is a really powerful position to be. And then people I think, look at me, like, why aren't you kind of worse?
Sad and crying? And
yeah, I mean, I certainly went through a period of grief. And I know, it's important to recognize, like our emotions, I sort of see them now as like a little guideposts. Like there's something he sent me. But I look at it as something that I can work through. And that I can then choose to move out of. Yeah. And that I don't have to stay in it. And I mean, this is a very different, Lisa, to a year and a half ago.
Yes, yeah, let me let me add here, I know that you're predominantly visual. So you're excited, and you move really fast. But there's something there's something in your couple of things I've never shared with you before is that you have become a much more powerful role model for your kids now, because they're watching the powerful version of you, not the old version of you. And they're in a formidable age, where had this continued five more years, you would have unconsciously taught your kids how to be in a relationship, and it's a broken relationship, and they would have learned that now they're learning something different. Secondly, a lot of people can probably relate to this. I've never asked you this question.Do you? Before you separated from your husband? Did you not separate? Because you felt guilty? Because you felt responsible for his well being?
Yes, I thought it would make him feel worst.
Okay. So you're okay, that's where I wanted to go. So partly, not entirely, partly What kept you in a broken really just a dysfunctional relationship? Was that you thought, Okay, this isn't working. But if I leave, then he's going to be worse, and I must be responsible for him, and therefore, I feel guilty. So therefore I stay, even though this doesn't work, because a lot of people are probably thinking that, and how did you get through that?
Yes, there's that there was the feeling very responsible for his mental state. There was also a kind of, I actually don't think I even entertained the thought of leaving, because my model of parenting was to stick together. So I grew up watching my mom stick by my dad, through his mental health challenges. And you know, Dad has dad overcame them. But it was a very significant part of my, my growing up was was dad and his challenges, then watching my mom sacrificed herself, and what she needed in order to make that better. So my model of reality was just like, I mean, like, I literally don't even think I realized I could make a decision for my self. And what I needed, like, does that make sense? Like I didn't even I didn't even come in. But then when I, when I realized this had to, this was like, when I realized I was done, I actually remember, it was actually a very, very, very clear moment. And I remember feeling I was driving away from where he was staying at that time, he was in a hospital. And even although he was in such a bad, bad way, I just, I just suddenly knew because I'd been doing the work on myself and my own levels of personal responsibility. I knew that if he wasn't going to be responsible for his own health and recovery, then, what was I trying to do? What and
how long was I going to allow this to be okay? How long could I keep depleting myself? What example was that setting for my children, and I remember, I was driving in it, literally, just not, not literally. But I felt myself taking the hands off the wheel of his life. And I just, I just was like, it's his job. And some reason that was a really big moment for me, moving from someone who felt very responsible. And so then just the crazy stuff started to happen, Jim, I mean, I got all these crazy signs, I've had people come into my life, I got all the signs, it was just like the universe had been waiting for me. Just go, come on back to you now. Like, let's do this, like you are supported. And I and and it's just been like miracle after miracle after miracle.
Well for and I want to go there and like where you are today. So I made a couple notes here. One more thing is you'd mentioned being triggered, as you know, that Nicole says, which she's been on my program multiple times. And she's the mastermind that says, I adore Nicole. And she's like, if you're not crying or cussing at Jim, you're not getting your money's worth and his work. And I remember Fiona, the best video ever. She was in the group recently, and she's back in again. And she posted this video and she goes the program, everything he does really works. But effing Jim. And I laughed so hard at that. It's my job to push people's buttons, as you know, because once we get triggered, and we start working through that, we stop being triggered, because being triggered is no power. And most of us go through our entire lives being triggered. So that's why I don't all I do intentionally, sometimes trigger people because I want to actually poke, which I've talked about before, because if I keep poking,eventually they will stop, they will stop reacting and they become more powerful. When that happens. Here, you said I'm sorry, go ahead.
Well, I was going to say on that power thing I remember when you were sharing if you don't think you can leave your relationship, you have no power. Yes. And I, I found that triggering once again, how like, what have come so far, what do you mean? And that I really recognize the truth in that now. And I see, you know, I mean, I've helped thousands of women judge their relationship with food. And, you know, there's just this constant fear, but I mean, I can see it in other people so much now is, you know, they want something in particular from their partnership. And they want the and they're not even giving it number one, correct.
And, and then that, but they also just sitting there accepting it, complaining about it, playing victim to it with that, recognizing that, you know, you've got a choice, you could stay, or you could go like, you could change this if you wanted, but it's like the most scary thing that I could ever have thought I was going to need to comprehend. Yeah, I think because of all the work I've done on myself, I'm just kind of moving through the process. It doesn't, it's not traumatic.
And you're doing well. But let me add here, what she had said is what I say in the program is that so many people are afraid to leave their relationships. And I say, because I have been there in my own life is that if you're afraid to leave a relationship, you have no power. And then what you do is you acquiesce to everything in the relationship because you don't want it to stop even though it's not the right relationship for you. What's not working, you are afraid to lose that because it's what you know. So therefore, you just stay in this mediocre complacent relationship for many years. And then that place, you have no power. So you stood up, let me add something here is something else you hear me say is you heard me say before is let other people have their own experience of life. And when you're trying to manage everything for your, for your partner, I was going to say ex, but maybe that's not the case yet. Okay, when you're trying to manage everything and be 100% responsible for everything in his life, you're not letting him have his own experience of life. Why? Because you're managing his life for him. So how can you expect him to grow and evolve when there's no need to because you're being responsible for his life. So what I tell people is let him Let everyone you know, unless they're small kids, and you're responsible parent for them, obviously. But as adults, let them have their own experience. And now he's having his own experience. And I would say at some point, I don't know when he will grow. But who knows when that's going to happen.
And you know, it's not only that, and and I do, I still feelit's a scary thing to do, not to just let someone go and have their own experience. But you know, what, where it's most for me?See, he can't get past anything. But you know, where, where the where the mostplaying for me right now is allowing my kids to have their experienced of this new paradigm for their family. And, and because I think also the reason why I was just so desperate, I was so desperate to make it work to make it better so that our family could stay together because our kids needed two parents living together and global story and story story story story story. Yeah. And now I'm like, you know what, whatever is going on for them, I have a large amount of peace about it. Is this is part of their, their life story now.
And because I know what I know, I am almost, you know, we can create the story together. And it doesn't have to be, you know, I recognize when they get into stories, where life is going to be terrible. Is it does it feel terrible right now? And we can we actually talk through it, like, it's so powerful to be able to recognize when they're going into like a thought spiral and actually being able to go hang on a minute, you know, that's,you're you're thinking that but is that really true? And this is because I think we try to protect our children from feeling bad of experiencing you know, life and and it doesn't actually serve them in the long run to do that. I don't feel so. I mean, I've been able to overcome a lot of guilt. I have absolutely zero shame about where the position that we're in right now. But I probably without taste it without doing a lot of the work on myself. I probably would have. But I don't I feel like an empowered woman making empowered choices. And,my kids, that's, that's them. That's what they see.Right now.
Yeah, yeah. So what is your story? because everything's a story is to let you stories that work for us to okay, because we can use some other direction. So it's a positive thing. What is your story now about being an empowered woman?
I think I think my my story is around.Right now, I feel very aligned with my values. And I didn't I wasn't clear on what my values were. I was kind of flailing about. Not I don't think I ever actually made decisions in my life. Well, I, I made choices by not making decisions.
Right is a choice of default. Right? Yeah,
I was like, I'm not the decision maker.
Literally different states, because, because they could have different jobs. And I'd be like, I'm just here, because, you know, it's good to go where the work is like, it was also passive. That was just like a passenger in my own life. Yeah, and now I feel like I'm in the driver's seat, I feel like I can recognize very clearly when my energy is being affected by a person or situation, I feel like I have a choice every day about where I focus my attention. My business is booming, because I am living in it from a more aligned space. And I'm not like I was I was attached to everything that my business was, instead of allowing it to become like I was becoming
What, let's back up, because we do have a lot of entrepreneurs, and you've heard me talk for many for quite some time about non-attachment. So let's go there is when you said you were attached to what your business was break that down, what did that mean?
So I created a business helping women feed their family, more Whole Foods,
And, and I absolutely, I have content coming out my eyeballs, I am good at it. I get results with people. And we work on a model of behavior change that's really around taking small steps. So my hope my it's all about just making small incremental changes, you know, so we don't have to have brains don't get overwhelmed. Yeah.
Very powerful approach to Yes.
Right. So and I can talk this, I can sell it, I can help people like they change their lives and what they eat, they feel great. And I could keep doing that. But for some reason, you know, the launches just became a little bit like, I'm people were starting to approach me to work with them on lots of different things. So I actually have a business mastermind over here in Australia, for online entrepreneurs. But that's because people asked me not because, yeah, I wasn't recognizing how people were perceiving me and the changes and the growth and how well I was doing, I was stuck in a story of self depecation for a very long time. And, so and I wanted to teach this mindset stuff. because fundamentally changed my life. It has it has revolutionized my life. And I wanted to take this, take a part of it, empower the women who I saw repeating these patterns of behavior with food, because and that was another big part of the reason why I did TCP was for my students. I wanted them my community, I wanted to be able to give them the tools to transform you, because it's so obvious. You can give people the meal plans, you can give people I could not make it simpler for people to just be basic.But late, but it was there, it was their stories that they would get like, I've just got no time for this.
No one eats it. So why do I bother? I mean, it's story after story after story. So I felt like. So, as I did my own work, I started to see it more clearly and other people. But you've seen me because it was the seed that I launched, it was actually after our first retreat in Dallas that I was like, oh, man, I just got to put this course together, I'm just going to stop procrastinating. And do you know what was keeping me procrastinating was my story of lack of clarity. I just had this thing like I couldn't get clear on what to teach and how to teach it. So because I was so attached to that story, and attached to this old business that I mean, I will also be in a position to take risks. I'm responsible for my three kids and rent, and all of that sort of stuff. So I was like, I'm not clear. I don't think I could do this. I mean, I'm not a brain scientist. I have a business that works. So why would I break that model? Why don't I just get over myself, and keep doing the thing that I know people want for me. And it was just a whole load of stuff that I just needed to start letting go? Like, what if I think about this all the time? What if I knew without a doubt that this was going to be
successful? What would I do? And I work from that place a lot now. And I was like, I'd throw something out there. Throw it out there. I ended up throwing up and I ended up creating this new program called ready for change. It's four weeks, I ended up charging double what I thought I was going to charge because you told me?
Yeah, I'm pushing you. Those of you listening, I'm still coaching or some behind her continuing to, to help her.
I mean, because oneof the my stories was my community.
They won't pay, they won't. They won't do that
It would be really confronting for them. And they're all on a budget and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, turned out I had my most successful launch ever, in my business.
And yeah, the testimonials that I've gotten for that program, are the best testimonials I've ever received ever. Those women's lives have fundamentally changed now, because they're changing from the inside. And that just required me letting go of my bullshit. So I could get out of my way and serve people in the way that I meant to be serving. Now, I'm not meant to be teaching people how to raise the chicken.
Exactly. And let me let me add there my story. So you know, and I don't want to say too much on this episode. But I've worked with a shaman for a lot of years and apprenticed and many years ago, he said to me, he goes, how come people, some big big names are out there talking about the kind of work that I do, but you're with me, and you don't talk about it. And I've taught persuasion and influence for a lot of years over two decades. And a friend of mine one time said this was in 2015. He said, Jim, if you consider that you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing. And I got into my story. I'm like, but I do I do people pay me good money for this, I do really well at it, I do like it, and I'm really good at it. And he's like, I think you need to be doing the transformational work, which I've done my entire life. But I wasn't taking it to the marketplace. So in 2015, I started doing one to one transformational coaching and 2018, I opened up the beginning, I opened up to group transformational coaching. And now I am I'm impacting thousands and thousands and thousands of people making millions and millions of dollars. Or rather, I should say attracting for my service that I create, that I put out in the world AYNI I'm putting out and I'm
bringing back. And it's so easy, and I get up every day. And when I say it's so easy, it's that I'm aligned, which you've heard me talk to people in the group about is we have to get aligned. When we align things start working very easily. For you. For me, when we're not aligned, that's when it's hard. That's when we're working. That's when we're struggling. And we're not we're not anywhere serving our life or other people's life to any degree that we can because we're not aligned. And you've experienced that as well.
100%. And I remember it I and we we aren't operating in a vacuum of my business and my personal life. It's not one or the other. It's both. And so yeah, course I wasn't getting getting to get the clarity that I wanted, of course, I wasn't going to be able to create the course that was coming through me like desperately while I was still trapped in a in a personal situation that just kept draining my energy was how, of course, it's all taken off, since I've made decisions that support me and my highest self. That was what I was waiting for all the time, or, like, there was so much around me that was just omit just waiting for me to say, and YES Now we're ready. things you've been lining it up, Lisa, but you needed to make a decision to get aligned to your, you know, your highest self, right? Yeah, then. And when you do you know that feeling like it's like jumping on a fast train, I can't believe the stuff that's happened this year. And that's why, you know, I really want to tell people who are who are in situations like I also wouldn't say that, that the marriage situation changed because without doing a lot of work on our own without taking it to the to the end of it. So it's not about just sort of jumping ship and you know, whatever. But you also can just
do that. Like you don't have to wait for anyone or anything you just started. You can make choices for you at any moment. And you're always supported. This is the thing, like there's just everything about the universe wants you to do that. And when you do, it's just it's extraordinary. So I just wanted to say to people, it's actually quite good on the other side. It's amazing on the other side, when you actually feel that feeling of living a life that aligns to your values and to your higher self.
Yeah, absolutely. And you've heard me talk about that for a long time, obviously. And I tell people because my own life was here years ago, I've done this for a lot of years with persuasion and influence him. I was in a rut in 2014. And I was like, you know, I'm making some good money. This is easy. But it's just the most setting the world on fire. And I said to myself one day because I tried to work mentally, I tried to work from the inside out. And when I say cry, I cried. And I was like, you know, I just can't seem to it's like I'm in a room and I can't find a doorknob to get out. And I'm just not fulfilled. And I said one day, if nothing changes, nothing changes. So you know what, even though I can't see where I want to go with all this, and they can't see my next steps, why don't I just take some steps because something that is something and something leads to something. So if I just take some steps, even though I'm stepping in the dark, something will open up. And that's exactly what happened. Because when I took a step, something opened up, I took more steps, more things opened up, and I am where I am today. But you know what I didn't know that when I started on this path with this particular kind of coaching back in 2014.
And 15. I just put one foot in front of the other confidently and and I knew that I love doing it as well. And I'm aligned. I'm 100%. You know, you hear me say all the time now, since you've known me in TCP is this is my dharma. This is what I'm on the planet for this is what I do. And Lisa and I are both sharing with everyone is once you get aligned, it's like I don't know what phrase you used a bit ago, but everything opens up for you and becomes and you're like, wow, how did life gets so easy? And you look at your checking account. You're like, how did all this money get in here? And I'm kidding, right? But you know what, I'm happy every day. It's I'm getting up and I'm smiling. And I'm looking forward to it. That's the power of alignment. So I will say, Yeah, I want to ask you. So I know your kids will be getting up in a bit, we successfully made it without the kids waking up right away, or the dogs barking here at the house. If somebody let's say you met somebody male or female, and they gave you their story, which mirrors your old story? How can you tell them to transform that? What would you tell them the transform your life the quickest?
There's two, there's two, there's probably three three pillars, I would say the pillars that have changed everything for me. One is responsibility. So that was my big sort of slap in the face moment of like, you're you're creating all this and if you are going to be 100% responsible for this situation. Are you okay with it? Like what what needs to change that? I don't, I don't know how to operate in life without working from a place of complete responsibility for everything that is and isn't in my life. It's the fastest way to make change. So that Module TCP, fundamentally changed my life. But
I think what you said there I want to take apart because that could confuse some people being 100% response Oh, responsible for what is and is not my life being responsible, but you're not responsible for other adults ought to be very clear about right that. Okay,
and and also much talking about responsibilities. Because I think, you know, tasks chores, and I think a lot of people hear the word responsibility, and they like, Oh, my gosh, I was responsible for so much. But that's notwhat this is about.
Correct. It's usually To Do List they think they're responsible for, you know, what they can be completely irresponsible as a being for the outcomes in real life, but they're still going to do list. Okay, that's one
that took that took me out of victimhood, and I needed to move out of victimhood. I didn't even know I was in it.
So like Katie, Katie is like, I'm not a victim, what are you talking about? Many people are victims made on other victims, okay,
The martyrdom story of motherhood and all of that sort of stuff, totally. So, the other one is stories. And that's it, it's being able to recognize, and this is what I teach in that four week program now is like how to recognize you're telling yourself a story, because we're trapped, and we're stuck. And we're overwhelmed. And we're repeating all this stuff. But what, like, once you get clear on when you are lying to yourself, then you actually you give yourself back your power. And if you can learn how to work with your brain to create change, and learn the power of attention, and all those sorts of things, then, I mean, everything falls, everything changes around you, it can't not change when you understand that stuff.
Because it reflects you.the universe, the external world reflects the internal world when the internal changes, the external changes automatically.
You know what it's like, because in TCP, there's just so many examples of people who were like, what, I'm just had a conversation with my partner, I didn't even have a clue he was feeling like that. And I've been in all this, this, this and this. And then suddenly, it's like, oh, my God, I just made that up. And it's, it's an extraordinary thing. And the last one would be energy. So my literally like, my vibration, being able to master that, being able to know that I can almost, you know, control that in a lot of ways she has helped her choose, it's helped me recognize energy leaks, like, I now can really notice when I'm when, and it's surprising, where you start to see energy leaks in your life, you know, things that kind of stopped draining you. And to know that I've got the power to plug that because I know 100% that my, my household, my business, my relationships, everything is impacted by my vibration.
And my energy. And so if I'm being responsible for that, like the responsibility and the energy come hand in hand, well, then how am I showing up for my best? Like, how am I showing up and being able to manage that in the best way? Like sometimes it's just about, you know, just something simple at putting some dodgy 80s music and dancing around the energy. But do you know what I'm like? It's, it can be so simple.
What do you mean? Do I know what you mean, when I'm the one to share these with you? So of course, I know what you mean.
I'm hoping it makes sense coming out of my mouth, not you
NO, perfect. And let me clarify from my perspective. It's like for example, I tell people and Lisas heard me say this, it's like you have a tire on a car, and it gets a nail in it. Well, that nail you leave it there, you've got a slow leak in your, you know, in your air and your tire and then very quickly, you have a flat tire. So what I look at is, how many things do we let create slow leaks of energy in our life, every time you're yelling at somebody or defending somebody, or this happens, or that happens, or you're dealing, you got all these little leaks in the tire. And then before you know it, you're a flat tire, when I met you, you were a flat tire. Now you are like a, like a brand new tire on a Porsche moving at 100 miles an hour. I mean, you got great tires on your car, but you were leaking. It looks like leaking it energy everywhere when I met you. And it's so funny. You say well, do you understand? Well, of course I understand. I'm the one who shared that metaphor with you is that we let people drain our energy. And you did a phenomenal job also, of sharing. It's always great. I think when people hear things from a different perspective, because I can say it all day long. And they're like, yeah, I get it, I get it.
And then you say it, because I've already said it. And I'm like, Oh, I can really relate to Lisa story about that. Lisa, I thank you so much. And especially thank you for the people that are listening that can hear they can see themselves in your story. And so you said responsibility. You said stories and managing your energy were the three things that you would would share with somebody right now to start transforming their life.
so Alright guys, you heard it from the transformational coach Lisa Corduff in Australia. These are the three things that you want to start doing to immediately start creating transformation in your life. Lisa, thank you, you didn't have to put makeup on. Normally she shoots or IG videos and she's in bed and no makeup on you look phenomenal. Thank you so so so much. And is there anything you want to share with the listeners before we go?
I just TCP is a no brainer. And it's the best investment I've ever made in myself. I mean, some people use the word transformation. But Jim delivers the transformation with this, this content and his ability to coach you and and I have been coached by some pretty great people. But I it's just the one thing that I would say, do it without even needing to know someone's situation, like everyone should do TCP because I feel like I've just got a bag of tools in my toolkit for my life for my children's life. You know, and that's a huge thing,
and they are not analytical. You have them as actual tools as well. You're a mathematical Yes, you're living proof and you're living it.
I'm living it like they they're a part of me. Now, I can't not be the person who's done TCP. Like I'm a different person on the other side of TCP. So I'm so grateful to you. And I'm so glad you're living your dahmer and all of your students, you know, inside those groups, what happens in there is phenomenal. And I've never seen it happen in the way that it does. So thank you, and thanks for letting me share my story with your community. I I definitely hope it helps people when they see that, you know, the immense power of of doing this work.
Lisa, again. Thank you so, so much. Get the kids breakfast now a big hug to you and I'll catch you on one of the other calls. Okay, thank you. Okay, talk to you later. Okay, bye, bye.
Wow, what an episode. And I'm sure that many of you could relate to Lisa story. And you could see yourself in some way. And Lisa story. And in my interpretation and opinion, that was a very, very powerful episode that can hopefully help many of you. Before I tell you what I think the transformational takeaway is I want to remind you is that you may or you may not know that I'm doing a three part transformational series, titled The BE DO HAVE series. And it's all about being ways of being ways of having, which are about, you know, characteristics and ways of being the series actually is very, very popular, there's no charge for it. And we have thousands and thousands and thousands of people that are already going through it, or that have registered for it. And I'm going to be doing it this final week, before I yank it down. And I won't be doing it again until sometime next year. So we've already done, how many have we done, we've already done a couple of trainings. And the third is today we're doing three in a series. The third is today, the link is jimfortin.com/bedohave . And it's also going to be in the show notes. And in this series, and I've gotten thousands and thousands of positive comments I know that it's hitting home with people is that I'm going to take you beyond what you've been learning here in the podcast.
And I'm going to help you, you know, go beyond this, but also come to know it and apply it at a deeper level in your life. So whatever you do, make sure that you go on over to jimfortin.com/bedohave and watch the three part series before we take it down, which I believe will be on Thursday, September the 12th. Okay, the takeaways, the transformational takeaway, which I believe if you've been listening for a little while, for at least the last six weeks, every transformational story, you hear that s word, the story word. And you will hear you will hear every person talking about how when they change their stories. And Lisa talked a lot about that. And this episode, when people change their stories, when they change what they say to themselves and what you know what they talked himself about. Everything in life changes. So you know, you've heard me say before or may have, even as I'm telling you about stories, notice that you are telling yourself stories about stories, you were telling yourself a story about what I'm telling you about stories. That's because we as human beings create story after story after story. And if you're not getting what you want in life, and you don't have the health and the wellness and everything that you want, change your story.
Okay, finally, the next episode is episode number 51. And that episode is going to be about how to use your mind for higher awareness and intuition. All of us have this extraordinary extraordinary power of mind. But most of us never tap into it. So make sure that you listen to the to the next episode, how to use your mind for higher awareness and intuition. Okay, thanks for listening. And hopefully I'll catch you over also on the BE DO HAVE series training, which by the way is no charge. Okay, catch you later. Bye bye. Thank you for listening to this entire podcast. If you're the kind of person who likes to help others, then share this with your friends and family. You know, if you found value, they will too. So please share via your social media channels. Also, if you have questions, I'm here to assist. You can email me questions to support@jimfortin .com and I may even use your question for a future podcast episode. Also, if you want transformational content like this daily, connect with me on Instagram, my Instagram name is@iamjimfortin. Finally, I do have a personal request. I believe that we're all here to help others and to grow and evolve ourselves. together. You and I, let's help more people. If you would, please leave a review on iTunes and a good one by the way. I'd be grateful and through your assistance together, we can transform more lives. Thanks for listening.