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EPISODE 180: “Interview – How To Drop Perfectionism And Control”

August 18, 2021

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It’s that time again. I’m doing a few interviews with current students and they’re sharing dramatic shifts they have made in their lives and they give you tips so you can start doing the same in your life.

This week I’m visiting with Trupti Karjinni. This hour is jam-packed with her sharing on how she overcame “extreme perfectionism and control issues” and a whole lot more.

Trupi lives in India and she talks about the Indian caste system and how she wanted to live her life on her own terms and you stopped living by “the system’s” rules.

As you’ll hear, before she met me she had it all in life: Money, love, health, and a great business but she was “empty and hollow inside.” Her exact words were “I was a pile of ash inside.” And, she’ll share with you how she found great joy and happiness in her life today.

She’ll share with you the extraordinary power of self-love and how that transformed her life, and she’ll share with you how she abandoned her old belief that she had to work hard to get ahead in life.

There are many many takeaways in this episode and she’ll share her discovery that the way to create more money in life is to stop being afraid to put money out. As you will hear, this can be as life-changing for you as it was for her.

This episode is pure gold for those who listen, absorb and apply what she shares with you.

Enjoy

Transformational Takeaway

Just let go of the belief that we need to make things hard on ourselves. And we need to work hard to deserve success because that is attaching our self-worth to external stuff.

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Full Episode Transcript

Introduction

Jim Fortin
You’re listening to the Transform your Life from the Inside Out, podcast. And on this episode is I do a few times a year, I have guest and these guests have been students of mine. And I bring them here so they can share with you the transformations that they’ve had in their own life by working with me. But the real reason is so they can share their story with you. So you can understand and gather more tools about how to Transform your Life. This week, we have Trupti, this sent this interview, and Trupti is from India. In this interview, you’re going to hear how she broke out of the caste system, how she decided to live her life, on our own terms, how she, and you’ll hear her say this, she was hollow like ash on the inside. And now she began living an extraordinary life again. And you’ll hear her talk about how living in you know India, it’s very poor, and how she does quite well, financially. So there’s a lot in this episode for everyone. So listen, enjoy, and share.
Jim Fortin
Hi, I’m Jim Fortin, and you’re about to start Transforming Your Life. from the inside out with this podcast. I’m widely considered the leader in subconscious transformation. And I’ve coached super achievers all around the world for over 25 years. Here, you’re going to find no rah rah motivation and no hype. Because this podcast is a combination of Brain Science, Transformational Psychology, and Ancient Wisdom all rolled into one to take your life to levels, you’ve never thought possible. If you’re wanting a lot more in life, for feel better, to heal, to have peace of mind, to feel powerful and alive. And to bring more abundance and prosperity into your life, then this podcast is for you. Because you’re going to start learning how to master your mind and evolve your consciousness. And when you do that, anything you want, then becomes possible for you. I’m glad you’re here.

How to Drop Perfectionism And Control

Jim Fortin
Okay, so for this week’s podcast, we’re doing a series for people that have been with me for a while they know is meaning the podcast is that every time we get ready to promote TCP Transformational Coaching Program, I interview students that I know can bring something to my general audience. That would be very meaty, very tangible, and something that can change their lives. So today, and this is not promoting TCP in terms of my objective, my objective is to like every episode to change people’s lives. So today, we have Trupti, and she’s in India. And I picked her because a lot of people want to be on the podcast, and I really don’t have guests. But I picked her. She doesn’t know why. I mean, I like her number one. But I picked her because she’s had such extraordinary transformations in her life, being with me the past year, but she brings two other elements. And I’m sure we’ll get into them.
Jim Fortin
One is how learning about different ways to think, changed her culture, you know, her growing up in the culture she grew up in, which is Indian, which I’m sure we’ll talk about. And secondly, I work with a lot of women. And I love their perspective. Because, you know, I don’t care what people say, we live in different worlds as men and women, we have different opportunities as men and women. And people can ignore that all day long. They can deny it, but that is the truth. So I want to talk, you know, we’ll see what comes up. But anyway, Trupti, thank you for being here.
Trupti
Thank you for having me. I’m so happy to be here.
Jim Fortin
Yeah, I knew we’d have a good time. And this is what I want to do first if it’s okay. tell the audience where you’re from, which I just did, but not your city or whatever, whatever you want. But tell them where you’re from. Tell them what you do. And let’s make just a little bit of your background. You know, what do you do the UK in terms of business and stuff like that?
Trupti
Okay. So I’m Trupti Karjinni. And I’m an artist and creative coach from India. So I live in a small town, charming little town called Telekom and it’s very close to Goa. So people usually like outside of India, they’re very familiar with COA. So I live very close to that and I grew up in a middle class family and middle class in India means very different to middle class and the US.
Jim Fortin
Explain that please.
Trupti
So I grew up my dad worked in a government job. My mother was a housekeeper and she had these big dreams of doing something with her life, but you know, she never made choices, active choices to make that happen. And I grew up in this household and I’m the eldest in the family and I have
Jim Fortin
Hang on again.And people that know me know, I don’t mean to interrupt, but there’s a lot to pull out of your okay. Yeah. Okay. You said she didn’t make active choices. Let’s go back to your culture. Was there a reason she didn’t make active choices that were culturally related?
Trupti
Yeah, because, um, you know, this is I’m talking about a generation elder to me, my parents, this generation. And the common narrative that I find even in my generation is that the woman takes care of the house. I, you know, I remember her telling me that she always told my dad that she wants to do something like, I want to do something, you know, open up a grocery store, like open up a shop or like an ice cream store. I don’t know. I just want to go and do something. And I remember she telling me that my dad told her that, why do you want to do it? Because I’m already doing it. Right? Just be at home and relax. You don’t need to do this. Because I’m the man. I’m bringing the bread.
Jim Fortin
Okay,
Trupti
Yeah.
Jim Fortin
So it’s not I just wanted to touch on that a little bit. So people listening understand the cultural disparities. But the reason I asked, you know, you said you didn’t make an active choice, because I’m sure we’re going to get in the choice. As we do when every time I interviewed somebody about their work with me, they recognize the power of choice, but I’ll let you explain that from your perspective. But what I guess what I’m digging for here, and we’re okay, we can move on was how you became who you were based upon who she was based upon the cultural influences. So I want to I want you to finish with your story. But I want to go back, you said you’re an artist, relative or something about culture. What does that mean?
Trupti
Oh, I said, I’m an artist and a creative coach.
Jim Fortin
Okay, got an artist and creative , as in say, What? artists and creative coach? Okay, okay, good. So, let’s go. So you talk to your mom, and your mom would never did anything different. And then you remember, because I apologize for interrupting you. But again, I want you to know me, I have the attention span of a gnat. I will lose my place. Remember where you were going with that?
Trupti
Um, yes, so I was going with the with that, you know, I grew up in a middle class family, where, you know, I was the eldest. So I felt a lot of pressure, not just within my, within my family with my two younger sisters. But I’m also eldest in terms of like, the entire joint family, right? I have cousins, I don’t have any cousins or any brother or sister who was older than me. So I grew up with the pressure of being the perfect model student, or like the model daughter feeling that pressure, and always like holding myself up to these like, unrealistic standards that I have to, you know, be an eighth grade student, I have to excel in everything, because I grew up seeing my aunts and uncles sort of like giving my example. Even with my handwriting, they would give my example to their kids, you know. So that was a lot of pressure to cooperate. And then. So growing up, I
Jim Fortin
Hang on a lot of people deal with that, as you know, because in TCP, we’re a very, very open and tight, tight knit community. And people share their lives. And I want to go there for a minute. And let’s dig into that is, and we’ll talk about it some more. Is you grew up thinking you had to be perfect.
Trupti
Yeah.
Jim Fortin
Is that is that correct? Okay, I’m hearing you correctly. So people listening, there’s so many people that think I have to be the perfect kid. I’m the even if you’re not the oldest or eldest, as you’re saying, I don’t know which one’s grammatically correct. But anyway, you know, we’re taught, and I grew up a bit like that as well, that we have to be a great example. And we have to be, we got to do everything well. And we have to make the best grades and participate in all the school activities, sports and scholastic and everything else. And we’re taught that everything’s got to be perfect. And then how would you feel if you felt like you weren’t living up to that, to that measurement? That standard?
Trupti
Oh, my God, I
Jim Fortin
There’s my answer. But keep on going.
Trupti
Wow. The sort of like self flagellation that came with that was just so intense. I would be I learned how to beat myself up very early on, Jim. It was it was a practice, you know, that I developed very early on if I didn’t, if I if I thought that I didn’t live up to a certain standard that I’m going to beat myself up.
Jim Fortin
Hmm. Okay. All right. Let’s move on, because I can’t wait to get into this. So you should tell your story. We’re pulling a lot out of it. And again, I’m doing that for people listening because a lot of people as you know, can see themself in you and that and I can see And how that how toxic that is to live your life that way. But we’ll get there. Okay, so you grew up that way, perfect student, etc. Let’s go ahead and go from there.
Trupti
Um, so, you know, through some, like, quote unquote bad choices that my father made in terms of financial stuff. By the time I was, you know, about to get married at the age of 26, we both plain broke your family money, my family was poor broke. We didn’t have the money to fund my wedding.
Jim Fortin
I had a very, very big one is that, uh, is that I don’t know, but I think I know, is that a bad thing in India?
Trupti
It is a very bad thing in India, number one, you know, forget about the, the wedding expenses. So here in India, the parents marry you off, right? Like they, they invest the money in it, and they invest the money in the betting ceremonies and like all the venue, and all of that sort of stuff. And, you know, I also had the attention of, but not so I kind of forgot where I was going. Okay.
Jim Fortin
So let’s go there, then let’s get somewhere else is, let’s dig into that. And then we’re going to dig into things that have transformed for you how you did it, in light of your culture, because there are a lot of things you changed in our time together that I’ve seen, even relative to the culture. But what does it mean? people listening, when you say your parents marry you off? And and how did you take that at that time, because we’re going to, we’re going to, we’re going to move forward to me working with you to share how you have a completely different view of even that, that whole process and how you want to participate in it. So what does it mean?
Trupti
So here, India, the cultural norm is arranged marriages, that is the concept. So the parents will find a guy or girl for you, you meet them. And then even if you even if you don’t really want to spend your life with that person, you’re gonna say yes, because you’ve raised to sort of believe that we know the what’s best for you, elders know what is best for you. And so you’ve got to listen to us because if you defy us, you’re disrespecting us. That is the, that’s the cultural norm over here. And then obviously, after you get married, you’re supposed to produce child, because, again, that’s cultural norm. And it is so deeply entrenched, that a lot of people don’t even stop to think about, if that is what they want for themselves. So when I got married, I was married outside of my caste. So marrying inside of the caste is like something that is still very, very strongly practiced even within my family.
Jim Fortin
Explain that explained, a lot of people in the US don’t know explain. Yeah.
Trupti
So you know, how you have different religions. So within, so I’m a Hindu, by religion, you know, by the bond religion. So within Hinduism, you have certain costs, which is just an extremely medieval in my interpretation, you know, used to be like a way to like segregate people into different sections of society. But now it is just got thrown into this monstrosity that divides people a lot. And within your caste, you’re supposed to sort of like, maintain, I don’t even know what it is, you know, I don’t know if it’s like maintaining the purity of the bloodline or what it is. But it’s people attach a lot of their lives and the meaning of their lives and their worth everything to the cost. So I fell in love with an amazing, amazing man who is just a such an amazing husband, and he was not in my caste to teach us this from a different caste And I married him.
Jim Fortin
Okay, so let’s go here. But I think we’re laying the foundation here. We’ll see where this goes. So again, I know you because I’ve spent a year with you, and TCP. Let’s get what let’s just kind of I don’t know what’s going to come up here. But what what were some of your biggest, which will tie back in some way? What were what let’s start here one by one. Give me one of your big life, transformational learnings, in TCP, and then how you apply it to your life.
Trupti
Okay, so when I started my business, it was all great things are going really great. And before at the time, when I wanted to join TCP, I had it all Jim from the outside. I had it all on the paper great husband, a great marriage, a business that was already thriving money that was coming in. But not as much as it’s coming in right now. But you know, things are great, but I was so hollow on the inside because I was in a constant burnout loop. And this again, ties back to that perfectionism, that standard. I was always holding myself up to that I have to excel at everything and I have to meet these standards. If I don’t do that, then I’m not worth anything.
Jim Fortin
So it’s interesting. It’s interesting, not worth anything. Is that really how you felt? Instead of just saying, I’m not good enough? You really felt like I’m not worth anything? Is that what I heard?
Trupti
That’s how bad it was. Because I didn’t know it right. That was my biggest blind spot. I came into TCP because I was constantly burned out. And I was like, I’ve hit rock bottom, and six feet of poop, and then rock bottom beneath that. And that was, and it was such a bad place to German, I was trying to, like, I tried to fix my phone outright, I try to come out of bone or try to fix everything. But then I found out that they were all like, band aids on a deep wound, and nothing was working. And I was desperate at the time, Jim, I was like, you know, something has to change. This is not how I can how I need to live my life because I have everything on the outside. And yet I feel like a pile of ash on the inside.
Jim Fortin
Yeah.
Trupti
And that.
Jim Fortin
I want to hear the rest of the story. So let’s
Trupti
And that’s were I found you. And it is so wild because I was at that place. And I keep I tell the story all the time. When I joined TCP. I didn’t even know what your face looked like, I knew nothing about you. I knew nothing about you.
Jim Fortin
And were you on one. Hang on? Hang on. Are you? Were you the one who said you got the email? You joined? Like an hour before the cart closed? knowing nothing about me, but you just knew you had that it was at you?
Trupti
Yeah. It was actually a race to the cart close. Oh my god.
Jim Fortin
Okay, so you didn’t know me you hopped in, you didn’t know what to expect. I don’t even know if you watch what we call a sales video or any of that. But anyway, you knew your life had to change. You hopped in, let’s start talking about your changes. And then we’re going to talk about applications for people listening. So let’s go here. First, you have felt hollow? Is Ash on the inside? Yeah. Is there anything you want to add to that? How do you feel now, and what facilitated that change?
Trupti
It all came from this attachment. I had this belief that I had that I had to work on my eyeballs bleed, like you say, deserve the success that I wanted. Because if I didn’t work hard, then I wasn’t worth it. I didn’t deserve it. You know, that is where it all came from. And when I joined your program, absolutely had no idea what to expect. I had no idea what you were all about. I didn’t even know you had a podcast or anything. But it was that such a clear indication from my intuition you can see from the source or from the universe, that this is what is going to help me change my life. And it was from that deep desire that I don’t want to live my life like this anymore. And I think like true transformation actually comes from that, you know, from that place, when you’re just all just finally ready to let go of your shit and be like, Okay, I’m done wallowing in my shit now. And I just want to let it go. You know, and I want something better for my life. And that is how I started and immediately after, like, you know, after going through this course and with the community and with you, I found out that I came into this looking for a business solution because I was burnt out and I just wanted energy to do more in my business.
Jim Fortin
That always happens that way. As you know, now you hear you hear it a bazillion times. I came here for business. What I didn’t recognize if I changed me, as a BE ME, my business will change automatically. They don’t recognize even though I say it, but it’s human nature. I say it a bazillion times and you know it now is everyone in the program and we have 1000.s of people that go through it will say I wanted more money or better business are better than that. And they recognized when they do the internal work on their perfectionism and how they feel about themselves and their work and their self value and their self love and self. You know, self esteem and self respect, and integrity and discipline and commitment. Everything else changes.
Trupti
Yeah.
Jim Fortin
Okay. So let’s, let’s go there. everyone listening, I’m going to like knock on your head. Do you hear me everyone? You touched on it earlier, which we talked about a lot. And then we’re going to make a note here so I don’t lose my place. If people try to change their lives, and they change them backwards. They try to change things in their life, instead of changing them. And when we change everyone listening, I’m going to grab you by the shirt and say you know Hello, we’re, excuse me, when we change the things we want to change, change automatically, automatically. Excuse me guys I’m getting over being sick. I don’t mean to call here. But but Okay, so let’s keep on going. There you are. hollow, where are you today? And let’s walk through some steps that got you from where you are. Make some notes to if you need. So, where are you today? You know what you are where you started? How did you get from point A to point B?
Trupti
Okay, so before I get into that, I also want to add two things of where I was. I was a raging perfectionist, and I had a lot of control issues because of that.
Jim Fortin
Yeah.
Trupti
Big time. And I was a complete dork. Before I came into TCP, I started to I started my transformation. It was like, I got into more things to fix it because there is no other way. So that’s what it was. And as soon as I joined TCP
Jim Fortin
Does that work people listening Did that work for you?
Trupti
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No, it did not work. Yeah, whatever little late work because I it had worked to an extent before I came because I had the business right. And it was thriving and everything. But it came at a massive cost Jim,
Jim Fortin
Your piece of most
Trupti
Peace of mind health, I had chronic pain for 13 years, I’d wake up in the morning feeling like somebody has hit me hit my back with a baseball bat all through the night, and I’m waking up with the, with the pain and the soreness. That’s how bad it was for me. And as soon as I came, I think it was just being in the energy and sort of finally seeing past my blind spots about how much how much of a death grip that I had to my suffering and to my control issues and my perfectionism. I healed. I released that chronic pain of 13 years in like the first three weeks, and we hadn’t even started subconscious reprogramming Jim. Well, I hadn’t even learned that powerful healing tool, which now I use, like daily, like with everything, I use that now, but I hadn’t even done that. And the first thing I did is to let go of control.
Jim Fortin
Which is, you know, I tell people that control is an illusion. And when you try to control things, you’re controlled by the illusion of control right. Okay. I mean to you know, guys, let’s everyone listening. I’ve never claimed to be a great interviewer. I’m doing the best that I can. So just deal with me, please. But you said, being in the last two days being in the energy of the group, what does that mean?
Trupti
Just, um, you know, even my students, right, a lot of the time, they’re like, I want more content, I want more content. But then I see, I see that the biggest and fastest transformation happens when you’re surrounded by people who are on the same group quest.
Jim Fortin
Okay, that’s enough, yeah, yeah. No, that’s, uh, you know, in TCP, that were really 95 90% of people are people that what I call waking up, they’re tired of the world they live in and the world around them and the mass opinion and everything. And they’re waking up to the higher power not all mean in terms of God or Krishna or Yakbae or the, the Bible, the Torque, none of that. They wake up to the higher power within themself as what I call the cosmic being. And they see that in other people in the group, and it brings it out in everyone. Okay, the second point was, dig into this a little bit if for whatever you want to share blind spots, explain what they are, and you’re laughing, explain what they are. And just pick one example of something that you saw that you didn’t know existed until you work with me and and you’re like, Whoa, all yours? What they are first.
Trupti
It’s simply what you don’t know you don’t know. And we can go through life doing, you know, with so many subconscious beliefs and actions, being in that automatic mode, just doing the things over repeat repeating all of these destructive patterns, without even knowing that those are the destructive patterns.
Jim Fortin
Yeah, we deny it right.
Trupti
And we deny it. We’re just not aware of it. And so as soon as I came into TCP, I was able to see my destructive patterns for what they were.
Jim Fortin
What’s the first pattern you saw, let’s go there, dig deeper, and then I’m going to turn it over to you okay, because I know people like Jeff Shut up. What, what’s the first pattern you saw and how Did you ever come it?If you can share it
Trupti
It was perfectionism and control issues, like because I wanted some janique for my business and the biggest blind spot, you know, the destructive pattern that I had was, you know, if I got to do it right, if it has to happen, right, I got to do it myself. And so had a theme, and I never really trusted them to do their work. And I had to go inside and micromanage. Because I thought I knew best.
Jim Fortin
Nobody can do it like me, right? I yeah, nobody can do it like me. Yeah. And that was my everyone listening that was mine for a lot of years, is that, you know, it’s just easier if I do it myself. Nobody can write copy like me. Nobody can do this, like me. Nobody can do and they’re okay. They’re good at it. But I’m really good at it. And I could really grow my business. Because I had my hands on what we call, I call my hands on the steering whell, white, white is called White knuckling where you hold the steering wheel so hard that your knuckles turn white, which is a control issue. Yeah, and I could never go on bottleneck. Okay, so you recognized that no one can do anything better than you what happened.
Trupti
It’s funny also, just how egoistic that belief is, you know. Um, so I took a leap of blind faith, Jim, and I let go of control. That was like, the biggest time in my business, especially in my product based business. And I was like, so we had a holiday sales coming up. And that’s like a huge sales activity, not for us, you know, in November in December, and I told my team, okay, I am letting go of control.
Jim Fortin
And they all fainted.
Trupti
They were thrilled. When I told them that I want you to handle this, and I want you to need this, they did not have any fear on their face, they were actually excited. And that’s when I realized that how much of satisfaction in their job, I was robbing them off. Because I thought I could do it better. You know, it was such a profound realization. And I let go of control. And I went in, and I taught them the main principles, but I let them do the work that I knew they would, you know, do well after, you know, I like omegle stick belief. And that was when I had my first quantum leap, a quantum leap. We just those two months, the sales in those two months, we smash it out of the water, and we crossed the entire revenue from the previous year. So 2019, all of revenue, we crossed it in just two months. And Jim, here’s the here’s the kicker right? Back when the business was shut off for like a good five or six months because of the pandemic. And we had just reopened in September when I joined TCP.
Jim Fortin
Wow.That’s huge. Oh, by the way, I’m just I’m just playing with you. It’s called Knock. Knock it out of a park not smell water.
Trupti
Yeah, okay.
Jim Fortin
I’m optimistic I can get her right. Okay. Right. And then you said, Okay, so that was your big blind spot, right? Is that you didn’t really recognize, as I heard you the power of letting go of control, and letting your team develop their skills, you get out of the way. Because guess what you train them. I usually you hear people I tell people all the time is 100%. Perfection is failure, which you are always looking for 100%, perfection 70% perfection and success. And you hear me tell people, when people when your team can do with 70% as good as you, it’s time for you to get out of the way. Let them do it. Because otherwise you’re gonna drive yourself into the ground. Okay, and then you said blind spots which we just covered. Okay, so what I want to do is shift a little bit, and I want to kind of just give you the floor. Say you’re coaching us, those of us listening, and we said Trupti and we’ll take these apart, what are the three biggest things that I can do to transform my life right now. We’ll spend the rest of our time if it’s okay with you on that if you haven’t, I don’t think you have much prepared. But you want to you want to dig in.
Trupti
I do because this one thing that I realized which is just such a foundation to the way I am right now the way I be right now you know what I mean? And it is that everything stems from self love. And yet it is the one that I had pushed to the farthest backside of my shelf when it came to my life.
Jim Fortin
Now hang on there everyone listening. We’re not going to teach them I put out a PDF recently, our audio where I talked about the most important foundation of anything, business relation, everything is self love. And we all try to go out and look for things in life. But if you don’t love yourself, how can you ever have the confidence and the feeling good about yourself to charge for your business and to promote yourself, and to put yourself out there and speak in front of people and to serve people? Okay, so self love was, as you’re saying, one of the foundational things that changed everything for you. Right?
Trupti
Yeah.
Jim Fortin
What did it change for you?
Trupti
Because I was working from such a broken strategy, that if I just fix things externally in my business, then I’m going to be successful, and I’m going to attract the money that I desire. But it’s when I found out that letting go of perfectionism, and really, because Jim I was detached from my heart and my body. One of the mantras that I remember, of Don Xavier is, you know, the hardest part to take is, you know, the 17 inches from your head to your heart. And I was so detached from my body, because I wasn’t in self love at all. And it was living in my head, you know, trying to overthink everything, overthink, overthink, overthink, do, do do and do and just fix things externally. But I found out that manifesting abundance and success and quantum leaps are all comes from when you are in complete self love with yourself. You know, and you learn how to take care of yourself and you learn how to be in flow rather than force.
Jim Fortin
Yeah, allowance, as opposed always. Yes.
Trupti
And so I found out that success and money is kind of like a side effect or like a symptom of all of that. It’s not something that I, you know, actively work on, you know what I mean? I don’t wrestle with it. I don’t try to do that. But when I’m walking now from alignment with myself, why taking care of myself, and that that quote, Jim hundred percent perfect is failure and 70% perfect is done. You won’t believe it that I repeat that to myself, at least one step at the moment, I’d catch myself now I’m so aware, you know, when I when I get into my old patterns of overthinking and overdoing something, I can catch myself now. And I have these tools to shift myself out of those things.
Jim Fortin
That’s it. That’s, that’s beautiful. Thank you. And a lot of people can I guarantee you what, everyone listening, I don’t have any pre prepared questions for our time together. And the reason why is I want it to be authentic, I want it to be real. I want nothing, nothing to be rehearsed. But as you know, being with me for two years now, or year now is even people listening, you saw a lot of this in TCP, the biggest issues they deal with are these two, two issues, perfectionism and control. And people get into perfectionism. Because they want to be approved of by other people, and the better they do something, and the better they are at it in their mind, then guess what people are going to approve of me. And if they approve of me, then they’re going to like me and love me. So I’ve got to be as true as perfect as I can. So that I’m loved. And I’m looking for love on the outside. And I think what I hear you saying which is what we talked about in TCP is a lot of comes on the inside, not the outside. And when we change the inside again, everything changes on the outside. Okay, anything you want to add to this, this first bullet
Trupti
It’s it’s Yeah, it was exactly everything exactly that Jim, I was seeking approval from the wall, trying to put on a particular veneer, I’m trying to appear a particular way because I knew that if I did that, then I would get the validation and love from outside. And we spoke about this in the in one of the recent calls in TCP. You know, I was so afraid to rock the boat to come out with my authenticity and now I see that living from a place of radical authenticity is the only way I feel 100% good in my skin in my body and in my soul. You know, I have to be myself. Because there is no nobody else in the world who is like myself.
Jim Fortin
Now Hang on. It’s personal. Maybe I know what we’re talking about. Do you want to share with the listening audience about what it meant for you to be 100%? authentic? It’s culturally based. Do you do you, if you don’t want to share, that’s fine, too. So you tell me you want to share now either waistline.
Trupti
Okay, so this is supposed to live, but I don’t mind sharing this because I know that it can help a lot of people. But one of the biggest choices that I’ve made in my life that is 100% authentic to who I am, is to is my husband and I have chosen to be child free.
Jim Fortin
You know, and that’s huge. and India, right
Trupti
It is huge In India, it is huge in India are considering that he is an only child, you know, for his parents. And so that was a particularly big barrier to overcome. Because, yeah, because marrying outside of your caste is still you know, like, they can wrap their head around. But if you tell your parents that you’re not going to give them a grandchild. That’s huge. Jim, it was like a big, like a big barrier for us to cross. And the only way that we did, it wasn’t by arguing with them, or by getting into fights or conflicts or anything, but by staying grounded in our choice, knowing that deep within us that is what we want for our life. And that is who we are as authentic versions, and we don’t need to conform to societal expectations of how we need to be in our life, and that we have 100% autonomy to choose what we want for our life. And yes, in this decision, obviously, my husband’s decision is like 30%. In this, we had long conversations about this, you know, it didn’t come from like, how do you say it? Like, once we, you know, when once people find out found out about this, they were like, but you’re too immature, you know, you’re too young, you don’t know what life is, you know, you don’t know what to want for yourself?
Jim Fortin
Yeah. Let me point out here also, is that I remember you talking about I don’t remember if he just did it, or you’re talking about doing it. How did you overcome? What tools did you use to overcome all of the pushback you got from the family?
Trupti
Okay, this is a good question. Specifically, what tools that I use. I just, I’ve always known I mean, I’ve always been sure of what I want Jim, even though I have like made like, I’ve had blind spots. But I know the kind of life that I want to live. And it is my desire to live a truly extraordinary life that is, you know, an extraordinary life in my interpretation. And knowing that it is my life, and only I can choose for myself. And when I can choose for myself, I can be 100% responsible for my decisions, even if I screw up some of those decisions. And when I let someone else choose for me, then I have like to wind up blaming someone else, you know, although, you know, letting someone else choose for me is also a choice that I’ve made. But no, I know that. It’s my choices that can lead to the outcomes that I can live with those outcomes, and I can move out of those outcomes.
Jim Fortin
Yeah. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Okay. Do you have we talked about a big takeaway, that’s all the the prepping I gave you is one big takeaway. But you mentioned a couple a few. Do you have one more flushed? big takeaway for the listeners? If you don’t, that’s fine. I just want to I don’t want to put you on the spot.
Trupti
No, I, before I go to the takeaway, I also just want to add one more thing, it is like the foundation of, of what you teach is from BE DO HAVE, you know, people, so I, like I told you, I’m a creative coach. And I started this, you know, in 20,21 minute call to do that. Before I manifested my first client and my mastermind and all of those things that came from coaching, I embodied myself as a coach for quite a lot of months before that started happening in my 3D reality. And it is that place I live from now, you know,
Jim Fortin
which I talk about all the time, identity, you became the identity subconsciously through repetition, and programming yourself, which we teach in TCP, how to be the identity of the successful creative coach. Is that correct?
Trupti
Yes. Okay, I was successful, well renowned coach, I am back in my body right now, in my mind and my behaviors, and I know that this being and it’s going to affect everything that how I show up how I do my work, the things that I do in my business in my life, and that is going to be to the outcomes that I want. So that is where I left from now. And the biggest takeaway Jim is to just let go of the belief that we need to make things hard on ourselves. And we need to work hard to deserve success because that is attaching your self worth to external stuff. But when we work from self love, and your self worth, and we walk in alignment with the things that energize us, that is when success and money just starts flooding into your life. And Jim, I mean, I mean that what flooding because the floodgates opened for me to the point where we crossed six figures in our business last year, when a big part of my business was shut down during the pandemic,
Jim Fortin
Combined with a lot of money in India.
Trupti
Yeah, that’s what a lot of money is a six figures USD is what I’m talking about.
Jim Fortin
Okay. That’s a huge there. Yeah. Okay.
Trupti
It’s huge. It’s huge. And it allowed me to have a much bigger impact as well. So we did we cross that. And then, you know, once I started working from self love, and once I let go of this, attachment to hard work equals success plus money, we crossed our entire revenue for 2020, in the first four months of 2021.
Jim Fortin
That’s huge.
Trupti
And I worked like, I don’t even know, like, 1/4 of how much I used to walk. You know what I mean? I didn’t do all of the external things. Like I wasn’t like, you know, consistently posting on Instagram or doing all the doing and doing right. It was just a way of being that allowed the floodgates just open an hour work from a place that, you know, when I invest in myself, you know, I participate in the flow of money, energy. And also Jim, one of the biggest things Oh, my God, how could I not speak about living in AYNI, doing everything from a place of AYNI from a place of giving?
Jim Fortin
Other way, hang on, there’s podcast episodes on that, that I’ve done here, I learned that from Don Xavier is living from AYNI believe it to me, that’s the number one thing that transformed my finances and life is not living to make money. Not living to build a business, not living this to rack up accolades or awards. And, and yeah, achievement. No, I grew up all of that. And all that I worked from, is, how can I help people live better lives? That is it. Your take on a please?
Trupti
Oh, my God, Jim. Oh, my God. So this is the way I see it. This is that energetic core that drives everything in my life right now. Doing everything that I do, the way I am in AYNI, you know, living with the law of reciprocity, working from a place of how can I serve How can I help someone better their life at whatever level I am at right now, you know, I don’t need to be like, you know what I mean, but whatever place I am at right now, I can help people. And when I walked on bad when I walked through a piece of giving without any attachment to what am I going to get out of it? You know, what is that? What is in it? For me? That has resulted in some of the most spectacular, magical things in my life?
Jim Fortin
Hang on. For everyone listening, though, you have to get value back? Yes, sir. I mean, because AYNI is a reciprocity, which means you don’t give everything away and want nothing for yourself. You give and you give to people. And this isn’t like you, you don’t demand if I do x, y, z for you. You do XYZ for me. It’s not that it’s serving people who want to be served by you, whether it’s working in a job, or an entrepreneur, and you know what you help me by letting me go through your course or your training on whatever it is, and then I help you by paying for that. So we’re exchanging here’s the key exchanging energy fairly back and forth. That is AYNI.
Trupti
Yeah, I I 100% agree with you. And it is realizing this, but allowed me to charge very well for the services that I’m giving to the world.
Jim Fortin
Stop right there. That’s why I made a note is, I made a note here is that a lot of things that I teach in TCP, you’ve heard before, but you don’t and you weren’t understanding them at a deep level. I don’t know if this is correct, but I’m thinking I see this a lot. You weren’t under, you know, you hear it all. I mean, you hear like, oh, wonder that I know that. You don’t know any of it. Because you’re not applying it. The key comes when we get out of our fear. And we take that leap, and we go in the application of these principles. That’s my experience. Is that your experience and that’s not been say so I mean, you don’t have to agree with me. But that’s my experience.
Trupti
No, I’m 100% with you on that, because implementation is big for me, I am not the kind of person who is just going to absorb all the content and just sit on it, you know, I want to apply it and I want to see it work in my life. And when I have like, applied each and every one of these tools, Jim and my business, and in my life, actually, you know, solving from a place of AYNI and knowing that money is energy, and we need to exchange a fair amount of energy for what we put out, it has to come back in, and I’m responsible for that as well. You know, I need to make choices to even allow that energy to flow into my life. And that is by valuing my value. That was a huge one Jim, and charging for my value. According to that. I that is why I like my everything is exploding Jim. That is the reason why it’s all exploding, you know,
Jim Fortin
You are correct. That’s what I learned. I learned that same thing. Yeah, and my life was work. And making money, I was making a half million a year, whatever, for many years, was a lot of work. And until I truly embodied it, what you are talking about now, and did it fearlessly with an open heart, that’s when the floodgates like exploded for me. And everything changed.
Trupti
Can I add something to that? Yes, you can. It’s about you know, like, what I’ve observed is when people want to know how we spoke about you, people need to pay you back the money energy for what they learned from you, but the value that they’re getting, when they what, what most people focus on is what is going out of their hand, as they’re letting that money energy go. But they’re not they’re not their attention is not on the compounded value that they’re going to get in return for the money energy flowing from them. And now when I invest in myself, and I’m very good at investing in myself, I know that whatever I invest is going to come back tenfold reason how I know that is because I trust I trust in the universe. But that is because I trust in myself know something that you had spoken, I think it was in my first round of TCP is that the universe has my back, because I’ve got my back.
Jim Fortin
A lot of people will post on social media, the universe has your back. Wrong. That’s new age thinking. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it’s incorrect. The universe, you’ve heard me say before doesn’t test you, it reflects you. And if you don’t have your own back, how do you expect the universe to have your back, you have your back, the universe will reflect that back to you. And that is huge, monumental, what you just said, Thank you for saying that is that you can sit there and go ohm ohm ohm all day long, and hope and wish and want to pray. And it ain’t going to show up. Until you show up, you create value, you require a certain reciprocation of value, that’s when the universe reciprocates and brings you the value back. But if you don’t do that, and ain’t gonna get back to you.
Trupti
Yeah, it is you thought, God that is such a life changing life altering principle to walk from and you know, it’s also you, if I don’t let money, energy flow from me, if I’m in that holding mentality, then that is what the universe is going to reflect back to me, right? So now I let go of money from me and the investments that I want to make in myself, because I know number one, that I’m worthy of these investments. And each time I’ve moved past that fear, Jim, and I’ve participated in the flow of energy, flow of money, energy, it has come flooding back into my life. I can’t even tell you like how many times it’s happened.
Jim Fortin
Yeah, let me go there for a second is I used to be afraid to overmanage my money. And that you know, what I want to do X, Y, Z coaching or consulting. I mean, I want to hire these people. But I don’t want to spend too much money, I can’t do it. And what I was trapped in growing up in poverty, I grew up not poverty poor. I never really looked at if I put the money out with the right people is a key putting it out with the right people and the right investments. So I put it out with people that have a proven track record. What’s going to come back to me. And when we promote TCP, this round coming up, which is the end of 2021 September coming up, we will have probably 30,000 people registered and probably a good 15,000 of those one of the guests with BE DO HAVE series. And then from there, those are when I’ve worked with me as you know when TCP will and the number one thing that I see. Thank you I used to live it, and I see it in people is, you know what? I believe you can change my life. I really I want your program I needed I needed I need it. But I don’t what we’re saying is I don’t trust myself to execute on what you’re going to teach me so that I will change my life so that I can get the money back that I the money that I air quotr spent, I’m not going to get that. And you’ve got your hands up, because you’re getting it I was there. And we live our lives like that many of us 80 80 90% of us. And it’s backwards. Because see, instead of putting out in the world and creating expansion we’re taking. And it’s so interesting, literally statistically 85% of people that go through BE DO HAVE, which you know, is a very comprehensive four part series, I’m in its full value, and they will do nothing and sit there and complain about their life’s not going to change. But until you change and do something different, your life will not change and be any different. No matter what you hope, and you wish and you want you pray. I’m talking to everyone listening right now, because statistically 70% of you are having money challenges. Trupti and I are telling you how I got out of it, how she got out of it. The key is taking action. Okay. What’s your final thing you want to share with everyone listening? If anything we’ve talked about a lot.
Trupti
Yeah, I’m thinking because there’s so many things that I want to I want to share. But okay, here’s the final thing that I want to want to share. Okay, hold on, I think you’ll have to edit this part out in the podcast. Sorry, Jim. There’s just so much that I just can’t land on one thing to share, you know, because what you said about that initial investment, that initial leap of faith, of investing in TCP, if people don’t do that, that is the very thing that is going to stop them from elevating in their life.
Jim Fortin
Meaning, thank you, and I don’t want to get all the meaning is they don’t have the tools to change. Yeah, but they won’t invest in the tools to change. And so the tools that have created a life You don’t want are the same tools that you want to invest. A lot of people want to invest in new tools to get new, you know, new tools to be able to change their life that they’ve not been able to change. That’s what you’re saying, correct?
Trupti
Yes. And ultimately, you know, the question is, when is it enough to live a life that you don’t feel good, and when is it going to be enough, when is when, when is the time going to come by and each one of us is going to say, Okay, enough, is enough, I My life has to be better now. And I need to invest in the tools that are going to help me better and get better. And I because it’s not gonna happen magically. transformation is painful. That was also one of the things that I discovered, you know, in order to make my life good. In order to be like this around I am right now I have to let go of a lot of old shit Chairman, it was hard to let go of that. And it is so hard. Like, that’s why you need assistance. That’s why you need to be in the community, the energy of the community, because all of that helps you move past that. Right. And I, I think like you know, it doesn’t matter whether anybody is doing a job or, or you know, they have a business or whatever it is. But I think each of us should aspire to live a truly extraordinary life. Like that is where I work from. I don’t want anything less than an extraordinary life. That can mean different things for different people. But who doesn’t want inner peace and happiness and ease in their life?
Jim Fortin
And money?
Trupti
And money? Yes. And and what is it going to take for you to just say that? Okay, now I’m ready for all of this.
Trupti
Yeah.
Jim Fortin
You know, Trupti I just, I think, you know, we talked about you grew up in a culture that’s very poor culture, very poor. And you’ve ever come so many the hardest boundaries in your culture you’ve overcome. And I want to just tell you, that hopefully, people listening people will listen all over the world. Hopefully, people will let it soak in because you’ve spoken truth. And when I say spoken truth, you know, we have 20 people. We have people in TCP from 20 different countries right now. Can you see the people in there, the Germans in the South Africans and this and the Australia and New Zealand and Japanese and you know, Colombia and South America and you know, all over the world. And you know what I’m saying this for people listening. We’re telling you universal truths. that apply to any culture, any background, we’re telling you universal principles, but you’ve got to apply. And here’s where we get into self denial, but while applying, and then we fall off track a week later, because we can’t even stay on track because we’ve not managed commitment and discipline and self integrity, which are things you learn in TCP Trupti, I want to tell you, I love you serious, I just adore you. And thank you so much for bringing your heart and your story to people listening. And I’m all I can do is simply just, you know, I don’t like this word, but hope that people males or females, wherever you are in the world, both sexes, it applies to all of us. They take your story, and what you shared, and at least act upon some of it. So they can have at least their version of an extraordinary life, which you and I both want. for everyone. I love you. Thank you so much for being Yes. Okay, you go ahead. Good.
Trupti
Yes, I just gonna add a closing talk, because I just want to I just want to say that this extraordinary life, it is all available to all of us. Doesn’t matter what cultural background we come from, you know, it is available for all of us. And it’s, it all comes down to choice, Jim like we spoke about in the beginning. It’s whether or not we want to make our life choices to get all of that because it’s not like any of us are special snowflakes.
Jim Fortin
Yeah.
Trupti
So what one person has is available for everybody else, because we’re all part of the same universe. And I just wanted to say that in closing,
Jim Fortin
Thank you, thank you. And by the way, you know, we cover a week of choice in TCP, everything is choice. And thank you for all of you choosing to listen today and to share this. And come on back next week, we’ll have another amazing interview with you guys. I believe it’s Manuel from Germany, who are one or a couple of people that I have done extraordinary things and our time together, and they will bring your lessons to continue to grow. Alright, Trupti have a great, great day to day? I’ll talk to you later. Okay. Okay.
Trupti
Bye, Jim. Take care.
Jim Fortin
Bye, bye.

Conclusion

Jim Fortin
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Jim Fortin

Jim is an international subconscious self-transformation and high performance expert with over two decades of expertise in brain based transformation and high performance. Using a brain based approach coupled with transformational psychology and ancient wisdom Jim has created programs that create long-term core-level life transformation in his students.

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