EPISODE 212: “How Soon Do You Quit?”
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If you’re like most people and if you were asked “How soon do you quit?” you’d probably be inclined to not admit it if you were so inclined.
This episode is obviously about not quitting before you create what you want in life.
If we look at simple motivation we’ll discover and we have heard things like, “You have to keep your nose to the grindstone” but if that really worked then wouldn’t we all just keep our noses to the grindstone? Obviously, we don’t keep moving forward when things get tough, most of us just quit.
When we’re talking about perseverance it comes down to a few things. In this episode, I talk about responsibility, self-integrity, resources, and resourcefulness. And, I talk a bit about the brain-based influences of following through and not quitting.
The predominant themes in this call are resourcefulness and creativity. Meaning, we often quit because we lack resourcefulness and/or creativity.
In simple terms, when we hit a wall, instead of “figuring it out” we lack the creativity to figure it out and most of us quit. And, then we wonder why we never have what we truly want in life.
When we recognize that resourcefulness is one of the most powerful traits we can have and exhibit we can then make just about anything happen that we want to in life.
I also hop over to intention, will, and making things happen in life instead of quitting.
The seven questions are:
All of these may sound like a simple snap answer, but when you look deeper, there is a great deal of introspection to be had with them.
The bottom line is that if you don’t have something in life that you want then you are not being 100% responsible for making it happen and you’re not being resourceful enough to be responsible.
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You're listening to the Transform your Life from the Inside Out podcast. This episode is titled How Soon Do You Quit? You know, I think most of us, we probably don't think of ourselves as a quitter. And culture that word quitter has a negative connotation unless you're quitting smoking or something like that. But the reality is and my observation of myself many years ago, and you know, the many people that I Coach now. Most people quit very very quickly. Very early in the game. They quit metaphorically the first five minutes of a four, four quarter game. And the quarter quarters, let's say 20 minutes. They will quit the first five minutes. So if you don't have, and you've not created the things that you want in life. Whatever it is health,wellness, relationships, or whatever. You've quit somewhere. So keep listening.
Hi, I'm Jim Fortin, and you're about to start Transforming your Life from the Inside Out with this podcast. I'm widely considered the leader in Subconscious Transformation. And I've coached super achievers all around the world for over 25 years. Here, you're going to find no rah rah motivation, and no hype. Because this podcast is a combination of Brain Science, Transformational Psychology, and Ancient Wisdom, all rolled into one to take your life to levels, you've never thought possible. If you're wanting a lot more in life, to feel better, to heal, to have peace of mind, to feel powerful and alive, and to bring more abundance and prosperity into your life and this podcast is for you. Because you're going to start learning how to master your mind and evolve your consciousness. And when you do that, anything you want, then becomes possible for you. I'm glad you're here.
Quit Being A Quitter
Okay so quitting being a quitter. You know, I've always been a perseverant individual. I don't know if that's well, partly it is. How I grew up, I grew up on a farm and I had to work hard. But I've just never really been a quitter. When I, when I get my teeth into something, I do it, no matter what. And I follow things through. Or at least that's what I always thought. I remember many years ago, maybe 25 years ago. I was waiting tables at a place in Atlanta. Very very high in restaurant. It was, it's actually one of the most well-known if not the most well-known steakhouse in Atlanta and it's been around for decades and power people come. And like, there was no big deal to have, you know, a US Senator in there with the Governor at the same time or some famous person, you know? And I've seen a lot of people there. Michael Jordan. Anyway. But the restaurant was extremely, extremely mega, extremely precision and detail oriented, oriented, and customer oriented and just. I mean, it was. It was a lot of work to work there. But waiting tables a lot of years ago it paid well. And when you start working there, you have to work five doubles in a row. Now mind you, you have all this information coming at you and all these things to learn. And then you're doing it every single day for all these hours, 12, 13, 14 hours a day, 5 days in a row.
And I remember on day number two or probably number three. I was walking into the kitchen and I was already exhausted and I still had two and a half days to go. And I remember another waiter walking in the kitchen as I was walking out. And he looked at me. I didn't say anything. And he looked at me and goes, Jim, we've all been there. Don't worry it does get easier. And to give you an example. I mean, a lot of us have waited tables. We're thinking, oh, it's, you know, okay. A lot of work. No, this place. Was very coveted to work 50% of people who even started training. Would not complete the training, they would quit. I mean, honestly, it was an ass kicker. Learning everything you had to learn and learning it well, going home and studying and doing it with precision at the highest level, like Ritz Carlton level. And we've even had waiters there from the Ritz-Carlton that left the Brits and they came there, et cetera.
So, anyway, I never thought, you know, I'm a quitter, but for a twinge of a moment there, I had a thought of. I don't know if I can do this. This is you know, and I didn't stop to think well, if everyone else here has done it, certainly I can do it. I wasn't there. I was along the lines of, I don't know if I can do this. Let me give you some examples here of people quitting very easily. And maybe some apply to you some don't, but I guarantee you somewhere in your life. This will apply to you. You know I'm currently doing a, what I call the acronym is TCP Transformational Coaching Program. And I find it interesting. Number one, you can't quit. Once you start, you can't quit until we're done. You can't ask for a refund until we're done. And I do that to get people, to push through things. Because if I don't do that, I would have a lot of refunds earlier on. And by the way, in five years, I've had maybe five or six refunds. I'm not exaggerating, maybe five or six out of thousands of people in five years. But the reason I have a a hundred percent refund policy, but you can't even request it till you finish the entire program. Turn your homework in to let me see that you've done the work then and only then can you request a refund. And I do that because sometimes it gets really challenging and really hard.
And that's when people quit. And I say to myself, you know what, I'm not going to set them up for failure. I'm not going to let them quit. And they find many people early on are like, this is hard. Wow. I didn't think it would be this personal, I didn't think it would be that in depth. Holy cow. I didn't expect to dig this deeply. And the reason I'm telling you this. Is when the heat gets turned up, how quickly. Do you turn and you run. Here's something else. What about when things become too hard. Think about that. When things become too hard. And I think many of us, when I was waiting tables, I could have said, wow, this is hard. It was hard. It was a lot of work. And I don't think I would've quit because I would've just, I would've not quit to spite the job so to speak and I would've stuck it out because that's what I do. But honestly, I did want. I think day three, I was like, I've had it. I, I I'm I'm. I'm fried I'm toast. But I knew I had to go on. But how many of you. How many of you quit? When things get too hard. Think about that. But let me show you something else here.
Most People Quit When They Hit An Obstacle
I've also noticed. I was talking to a friend of mine. One time you can find her online. Her name is Shama Hyder S H A M A Hyder. We've been friends for a lot of years, and I haven't seen her in a few years. She runs a very large social media company. And for many years, a highly awarded social media. I guess I'd say personality. And she and I were just chatting one day and she goes, you know, Jim, most people quit way too early. And her, you know, what she said was interpreted as you want. But she goes. They won't do the work. And she was probably 25 or so when she said that, And today she's an extraordinarily. Very very successful professional woman. That owns a very, you know, successful company. But she had that attitude in her back then. Is I'm going to make it happen. I'm going to do something. I'm going to do whatever I can to make it happen. But where I was going with that where most people quit. Is when they hit an obstacle. That's not so hard to get through. But they can't see a way around it. Meaning okay, boom. I just bumped into this 12 foot wall and I'm here by myself and I have nobody to lift, you know, lift me over the wall. I don't have a ladder. How do I get, you know, how do I get over this? I've got to get to the other side. And then what a lot of people do when they can't figure it out. They quit. Seriously. And I can't say that I wasn't probably like that at some point in my life. And what I know now. Ismthings can always be figured out 100% of the time, things can be figured out. And if you're quitting because you hit a wall.
Really all that saying. Is that you are a quitter because, because. You're not being resourceful and you're not being creative. So ponder that. I want to jump around a few places in this episode uhcandidly, when I put this episode together, I'm like, what I want to talk about? And as I've said before, I have a list of a lot of things, and I have lists all over the place and different things. And tonight I'm like, you know, this is, this is a a good one to do. And by the way, I will tie this into some spirituality in a bit, but this is not a rah rah, motivational your blob. No, this is real. This is very simple and very real.
Are You Being 100% Responsible?
I have a question for you. When you quit. The times in the past. I want you to think back to a time in the past. There we go think back to a time in the past where you were doing something. And you quit. And you quit because you hit a wall or you couldn't figure it out. Or you had bad planning or whatever it might be, but you quit. The next question that I have. Is were you a hundred percent responsible? You've heard me mentioned that before, were you 100% responsible for the outcome. I'm going to tell you right now, no, you were not responsible. You were not a hundred percent responsible because if you were a hundred percent responsible, you would have gotten it. Done. No if's, no and's no but's. So then what you did is what a lot of us do. Is we fall back into our excuses. I couldn't do it because of X, Y, Z. And you've heard me say before. The reason we make excuses is because, you know what. They make us feel better about ourselves. As long as you can make an excuse about something, guess what? You're no longer responsible for it. Oh, it wasn't me. It was X, Y, Z. Don't look at me. I didn't do it XYZ did it, or I couldn't do it because of blank.
You quit and it's simple. Now, when I said, I want to go somewhere else here, I want to talk about, and that part, this is partly what convince me to do this episode. Is doing the Transformational Coaching Program. We have a private group where everyone's in it. And they comment about a whole, you know, a whole bunch of things. And today we did a, an extended call, a coaching call with the group. And a lot of people talked about their pattern being is getting started at something and then quitting. I could relate to that many years back. But see that really comes to a couple of things. It comes to, do you really even know how to be committed? Which I've talked about in this podcast before. You know, I grew up with an alcoholic dad who never finished anything. And when I said alcoholic dad, Well, he would finish here. So he did, I was incorrect. He did finish a lot of alcohol, so I, okay. So he did finish. Something's just not the most productive things. But I'd watch him start all kind of projects around the house. And never finished them. So what I was taught at a very young age is, you know, what. It's okay. It's okay. Not to be committed to things. And I learned that and live that paradigm for many years of my life. So commitment. Are you really committed to something? When you set out to do it because something's causing you to quit. Very quickly. So are you committed?
Self-Integrity And Commitment
And there's a couple of places I want to go stay with me here. Another concept is self integrity. Meaning, do you do what you say you're going to do when you say you're going to do it? But in particular to yourself. Do you go to the gym? When you tell yourself you were going to the gym? Now transparency here. I tell myself I'm going to go to the gym three days a week. I have an online trainer, a virtual coach right now. And I've only missed, I think two workouts in like four months. And I was supposed to go yesterday. I got Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and I didn't. So you know what I went today. Today's not my gym day, but I went because I missed yesterday and I had to go yesterday. Why? Because I committed not to my trainer. He never even asked me to commit. I committed to myself. That I'm going to do this. So look at your level of commitment and then look at your level of self integrity.
Now ask yourself, am I committed to my outcomes? Am I a hundred percent responsible? And am I demonstrating self integrity. Meaning am I doing what I say I'm going to do? When I say I'm going to do it. That right. There might be some clues as to why you quit. Now another direction here. I've taught NLP Neuro-Linguistic Programming. For a lot of years. And in NLP. There's a concept called meta programs. Basically they're like individual programs. That we run that are pretty much brain-based. Now, one of the programs is called general versus specific. What I mean by that general versus specific a general thinker, which is what I am. Things in big pictures. Meaning, I don't want details. I don't want to be specific about things. If you're trying to sell me something. Tell me how much it's going to cost. Tell me what it will do for me. And then tell me when I can get it. That's all I want to know. Now a specific person. I would want to know all the details.
Everyone detail, detail, detail, detail, detail. But if you tell me details, My, my eyes are going to glaze over. Why? Because I don't want to hear them. My brain just can't process the details. Even my team, when they give me my task and things that have to be done for the week, I have to do list and task list. And things like the podcast, for example, And just different things like that in the business. Is my team said, you know, we recognize long ago. If we give you a long detail list with a lot of task. Then you're not going to do it all. And the reason why is I get lost in the details. So then I might quit. Okay. So the reality is they've recognized to get you to be the most efficient Jim. We have to give it to you. Three bites at a time. And they haven't counted or any of that. I mean, they don't know more advanced NLP and stuff like that. But they're like, if, if we give you three tasks a day or three tasks, you know, depending upon where we are in the business growth, this week, three task, you can track, you know what those three tasks are. They're right in front of you.
So the example here I want to share with you is maybe part of your quitting is not about the characteristics and ways of being of being self integral and a 100% responsible and committed and things like that. Maybe it's partly the way your brain processes. And a little more about that. So. If you're a general thinker. That means you don't want details. That means your brain wants to think in a big picture. But here's the problem. If you don't want details and you're trying to build the business, you're doing it as a solopreneur. It's going to be also impossible or pretty much impossible to build the business because you're such the general thinker. That you don't build in build in these specificity. Which means you don't build in the steps to help the business grow and get it off the ground. So the reason I'm sharing this is when we quit sometimes it's not just a matter of the characteristics. But it can be a matter of the way that our brain processes. Now, some people could say. You know what. Some people could say. Well, okay. I can quit because my brain just didn't get it done. My brain just wasn't able to process. You know, process that.
Are You Being Resourceful?
Well, the next question is. Do you figure it out? Do you figure out what needs to happen? And it's vital that we do that. And that's what I said earlier about lacking the creativity. Or, you know, just going in the resignation is, well, I hit a brick wall. Okay. I'm going to stop because I don't know how to get through it. At this point, or I don't have the resources to get through it. I'll tell you right now. People who make things happen. They get resourceful with finding the resources. And you probably have heard me talk about that as well here on the podcast. Is how resourceful are you? And do you value resourcefulness more or resources more because resources are finite. And many times. Many times. I'll say it again. Many times people quit because they're not creative and resourceful. And let me demonstrate that with a pretty simple question. I'm going to ask you a question right now. And a lot of you will be able to answer. But even more of you. will not be able to answer.
You ready? That question is this. What do you want? What do you want? Four simple words. What do you want? And a lot of people will say, well, I want a lot of things. But what a lot of people will say is. I don't know. I don't know. And I had a coach of mine one time. Larry, a really good Transformational Coach. And he said, when you say, I don't know. That's a lazy answer. Which, and what we're talking about here in this episode, it goes back to you being not motivated enough to be resourceful to figure out the answer. And let me add here is that all of us want something. I think about that Every one wants to create something. And it can be as intangible, but as powerful as peace of mind. It can be a brand new Porsche. It can be a new home. It can be a hundred thousand dollars. It could be 10,000. It can be a million. The point is. Every one wants something. But most people actually will quit. Because you're not being resourceful and creative. To figure out how to create it. You know something I said on a call today. Is talking about money.
We live in the U S where 80% of the population lives, paycheck to paycheck. And many people listening to the podcast episode have money challenges. And the reality is plain and simple. Is number one that comes from your subconscious conditioning. So in your mind, you're not wealthy. But also interwoven with this. So there's nothing, we can point a finger out, a finger out a 100% pe. We have to just look at it. But inter
woven with this is if people are in desperation for money. They are not being resourceful in creating it. I remember at a transformational weekend that I was, I was out about 10 years ago. And we were all given there's only eight people there. We were all given a paperclip. And they said you have to go out and the next three hours and trade this up. For as much as you can possibly traded up for. Ponder that. So if I imagine that I gave you a paperclip and that's it and said, go out right now, leave the office, leave wherever you are. You've got to take that paperclip and you have to keep trading it and trading it and trading it. Until you bring something back, of significantly more value. What would you do? What would you trade the paperclip for, think about that? And I don't, I don't recall what I traded the paperclip for, but I remember. I remember talking to a lady one time and she was selling roses on the side of the road and they were $5 arose. And. I mean, all you have is a paperclip. That's where you start. So therefore I did not have $5 in my pocket yet, as a result of this exercise. And I was going to trade her something for it.
For the rose, because I knew I could. I knew what I could do with the rose I could parlay that and the $10 when I could find some guy, this was by the way and a place that had a lot of restaurants and a lot of couples, you know, dinner out for an evening and all that. And I knew that if I had the rose. I could take the rose and parlay that into at least $10, probably more when I got more creative, but I could take it and parlay it into at least $10. And then I had some working capital that I could do more things with. But the lady that was selling the roses. I had forgotten, but I was very creative because I've also been a marketer for a lot of years and I was very creative. But I don't recall what I offered her. But all she could see here's the takeaway. All she could see was the $5 for the rose and that was it.
No $5. No rose and she couldn't. I presented her with opportunities. To take what I was actually wanting to trade her. And I even told her multiple ways she could take what I gave her and she could actually buy more roses with it. But she couldn't see that. All she could see was you give me $5 and the subject I give you rose and the subject. And then she, she was in no way. No way resourceful with the opportunity that was in front of her. So the question, hopefully I got the ball across the plate. The question for you. How often. Do you quit? When on the flip side. You could be resourceful. To know how to create. Whatever resources you need. To get the outcome that you wanted. Think about that and I'm going to go back. It's not a hundred percent, but it's pretty airtight. Go back to what I said a little earlier.
If You Don't Have What You Want In Life You Are Not Creating It.
If you don't have what you want in life. And you're not creating it. And I talked about self integrity and I talked about responsibility. And those are all part of the equation. But, you know what at the foundational level. You're not being responsible enough to make it happen. And you're not being resourceful to be responsible. Let that settle in. Because I know that often times we hear. We hear a podcast. And we're like, Ooh, that's really good. Okay. Yep. Yep. Yep. And then two, two seconds later, boom. It's out of the brain. Why? Because what? With our very limited attention spans. We're off to doing something else. And we forget the gold bricks, right. In front of us. When it comes to not quitting also couple of different directions here, I'd mentioned that I want to talk a little bit about spirituality and cosmology. One of the earlier episodes. It's probably a hundred episodes ago. I talk about using your intention and your will. We live in a world where people. Are are immersed. They bathe themselves in the 3d world, which means a world of the physical, the observable and the tangible. They live their entire life in that reality.
They live. They die. They try and they quit. They quit. And that reality. And the truth is when you use your intention and your will. You'll always find a way. You will always find a way and let me synopsize this part of it and just say it as simple as I can and I know that sounds again, like, you know, rah, rah motivation. One-on-one. But a phrase that is so true it's so true that it's almost banal and we ignore it. But if you want to bad enough, You'll find a way. I think about that. And when you really get the gravity of that, When you want something badly enough, you will find the way. You will find a way to create resources through being resourceful and that is what I just said. The fancy words are intention and will.
But intention and will put in the tangible terms is if you want it. Make it happen. About quitting. I don't love what I do. I am extraordinarily passionate about what I do. Which maybe that didn't come across correctly, but I mean, it's beyond love. This is what I do. But see what I do. Is my Dharma. Which means it's my life force. It's why I'm on the planet. And I'll tell you something right now. If you stop trading your life for dollars. Stop trading your life for what you think you're supposed to do. Stop trading your life for the illusion. The illusion. Of security and safety, which is literally third time an illusion. And you live. What you're meant to do. And you do what you're meant to do. And you do it with heart. Number one is a lot of things will open up for you. But the bigger point is you won't quit. You won't quit. Like, for example, People talk about retirement. I am 57. And I don't know how long I'm going to be on the planet. I would assume at least another 30 years. I don't know, it could be seven minutes.
It could be seven seconds, which I hope not because that wouldn't be able to finish this episode. I guess I can finish it from the ethers. But. But, you know what. I will do what I do until I can no longer do it. And hopefully that means that I've transitioned off the planet. Because this is what I do and I do not quit what I'm here to do. Now remember earlier, let me tie this back. Is it's almost well, it's interesting to watch. Many people will say, well, scratching your head. I don't know what my Dharma is. And your Dharma is what is your sole mission to do on this planet? And many people will go in that circle for years, trying to figure out when it's right in front of them. If they had the clarity to open their eyes at a higher level and see your Dharma is right in front of you.
Your Dharma is right in front of you. But what many people will not do? Is, they won't look deeper. Or look more comprehensively. Or get more resourceful to figure out how to make their Dharma work. Because many people, the first place they go is how do I make my Dharma make money for me? Meaning, I love my dharmas mowing yards or babysitting kids or doing transformational coaching. I don't know. But many people will say, well, you know what? I don't know how to make a living at that. And that again is a lack of being resourceful. Because you can't see it. So then you quit and you're not living your Dharma. Okay. I want to leave you with two final thoughts. That are very powerful thoughts for me. And one of them is by Eliphas Levi. Eliphas Levi. He was an occultist from the 1880s. And when I say occultist, a lot of people automatically, and the erroneously assume. Ooh, that's black magic. Well, it could be black magic. But there's also white magic and he worked on the white side. Now, remember I said, will I said intention and will a better go. Here's what I want to share. Here's one of Levi's quotes. My will is a real life force. Capable of achieving absolutely anything from the mundane to the miraculous. Let that settle in. Let that rattle around your will, which is your life force, which again, there's a whole episode on it. And basically it's when you decide you're going to make something happen. Is capable of achieving absolutely anything. From the very basic, simple things to the extraordinary things that is the power of your will.
And when you use the power of your will back to the beginning of this episode, when you use the power of your will. There's no need to quit at any point. When you want to create something. Because you're using your sheer life force. Your power as a being. And when you do that anything is possible. I say it often. Thank you for listening. And, you know, the podcast has grown quite large in the last couple of years, and I'm grateful for the opportunity to be able to serve. Thank you for listening and a request, a little AYNI A Y N I reciprocity of life, .As I've given to you in this episode. Please give to me. And share the episode with your friends and family and people that you think or know would find benefit. And the content that I have here. That being said, I'm very grateful for you. Thank you so much. Make it a great day and I will catch you on another episode. Bye-bye.
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